Stacey A. Shannon is a freelance journalist and blogger who has been published internationally. She's also a Christian, a wife and a mom of two school-aged children. She started Families with Grace in 2019 to encourage Christian moms as they create homes filled with grace, love and faith.
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I love summer dinner ideas that are pretty healthy while also being quick and easy. So I’m running a series for a few simpler summer dinner ideas over the next few Tasty Tuesdays. I’d love to hear from you and any suggestions you have for what you make for your family during the hot days of summer!
As we’re continuing our simple summer dinner ideas, I had to share this hot ham and cheese sub recipe. It does use the oven, which isn’t ideal for the hottest summer days, but it doesn’t need the oven long. Best of all, this simple summer dinner idea is quick and easy, which is perfect for busy (or lazy) summer days! It’s so simple, I often make one or two for lunches!
These hot ham and cheese subs with honey mustard are a lot like the pizza subs I make for my family. In fact, some of my family members who are more particular eaters don’t eat ham, so I usually make them pepperoni pizza subs whenever I made these hot ham and cheese subs. It’s easy enough to customize them for whatever your family likes most.
Getting started
Start off with preheating your oven to 400-degrees (F). Prep your baking sheet for your subs. I am a huge fan of non-stick aluminum foil to make for easy clean-up. Parchment paper also works as does spraying your baking sheet with a bit of non-stick cooking spray. Then, Split your sub buns in half.
Put the open, plain sub buns into your preheated oven for three to five minutes. You want them to start to toast a bit but not get brown. Basically, you’re firming them up. They should look like this:
Putting the sandwiches together
Once your sub buns are ever so lightly toasted, you’re ready to start building your sandwiches. First, spread mayonnaise on both sides of the bun. I squeeze mine on, but I think it’s about 1 teaspoon per side.
Next, put the honey mustard right on top of the mayonnaise. Again, I estimate about 1 teaspoon per side, but I kind of just dollop it on out of the bottle. It looks like this:
Then you want to smear together the mayo and honey mustard. The two sauces mixed together are what take these hot ham and cheese subs up a notch!
Next up is stacking on the ham. Put 3 to 5 slices of deli honey ham on each side of the bun. The amount of ham you use really depends on how thick your ham is sliced and your own preferences.
Then you’ve got to add on cheese. I love Swiss cheese with ham, but cheddar or American also work. To be easier, I use slices, but shredded cheese would also work. And I split one slice per sub, so each half gets a half slice of cheese. But you can do it as you prefer.
Baking time
That’s all the prep needed. Your hot ham and cheese subs are ready to go into the oven. Bake them at 400-degrees (F) for 10 minutes until the cheese is bubbly and some of the edges of the ham are crispy. (If you are really in a hurry, bake them for about 6 minutes and then switch to broil on low for about 2 minutes. Only broiling leads to a soggy bun and burnt edges on top.)
These hot ham and cheese subs are best served right away. I usually put mine together as a sandwich and cut it in half to make eating easier. You can leave them open face if you prefer.
I suggest pairing the hot ham and cheese subs with an easy side to keep dinner easy for your family this summer — or any time! We often go with chips. A tossed salad or potato salad would also go well with these subs as would fresh vegggies and dip. Enjoy!
Split the sub buns in half so they are open. Place the buns on a baking sheet sprayed with non-stick cooking spray or lined with non-stick aluminum foil or parchment paper.
Put the buns in the preheated oven for 3 to 5 minutes until they are very lightly toasted and just barely starting to brown around the edges.
Spread about 1 teaspoon of mayonnaise on each side of the open faced buns.
Add about 1 teaspoon of honey mustard on top of the mayonnaise and smear together with a knife or spoon.
Place 3 to 5 slices of deli honey ham on top of each half of the buns, on top of the mayonnaise honey mustard mixture.
Add a half slice of cheese per half of side of each sub. (Or you a whole slice per side if you prefer for a total of two slices of cheese per sub.)
Put bake in the oven at 400 degrees (F) for about 10 minutes until the cheese starts to bubble, the edges of the ham are crispy and the buns are golden.
Put the buns together to make into sandwiches and serve immediately.
A couple of weeks ago I had an appointment with my urologist. I walked out of his office with tears in my eyes. I stood before the elevators and tried to grasp what had just happened.
This wasn’t the first time I’d felt teary and overwhelmed after leaving his office. I’ve been seeing the guy for two decades to treat my interstitial cystitis. I’ve seen his receptionist and nurse retire. At one point I went so often that I noticed any small change to the waiting room layout and pretty much the entire office knew me by name.
I’ve left there in significant pain. In the past, I’ve walked out of there disheartened because I knew there were not answers for my pain and discomfort.
But I had tears in my eyes following my recent visit for a different reason. After going down to yearly appointments to keep up with my medications, my urologist said something I truly never thought I’d hear him say. He told me it’s up to me whether I return to see him again. He was releasing me because I didn’t really need him any more.
Even now those words choke me up. This journey I’ve been on started when I was 3 years old. There have been highs and lows. I’ve had times that were miserable and a short period of time in high school and college when I was in a remission. But since my symptoms returned when I was 23, they have taken me on a journey I wouldn’t wish on anyone.
About healing
Being in your early 20s with health struggles is difficult. None of my friends really, truly understood where I was coming from. I sought out others with IC and others with chronic pain. We knew the struggle. We understood feeling left out, trying to juggle appointments, figuring out how to pay for everything and praying desperately for healing.
When I was younger, I thought cancer would be better. Cancer is something you either get better from or don’t. It doesn’t just continue indefinitely. Through the years I’ve learned that’s not even close to being the case, but when you are struggling with finding hope through constant pain that nobody has a solution for, thoughts get crazy.
I won’t bore you with details of all the various treatments and medications I’ve tried. However, I do want to share with you my journey about healing and my faith. In my mid-20s, God showed me I was putting my hope in the next line of treatment or medication instead of putting my hope in Him. I wasn’t truly living faith. I shifted my perspective and began keeping my hope in God and trusting that whether any treatment worked, God would be with me every moment. And He has been!
But then that begs the question of supernatural healing. I have seen God heal people. My dad is alive today thanks to the divine touch of our Heavenly Father. I know God has and can heal people. He wasn’t healing me, though, and that was something with which I struggled. A part of me thought since I’d put my hope in God more than in medicine, then I’d learned my lesson, and He’d heal me.
I’ve prayed for healing. I know others have prayed for healing on my behalf. However, God said no. Eventually, the Holy Spirit led me to pray for healing from the need to be healed. That sounds confusing, I know. I was just struggling so much with wanting to be healed that it was getting in the way of my relationship with God. It was affecting me in many ways, and none of them were good. When sermons were about being healed or I felt like other Christians were implying anyone would be healed with enough faith, then I got upset. My heart ached and I’d feel discouraged. I thought I was living faith, yet sometimes I didn’t feel like it.
My prayer for healing from the need to be healed was answered pretty quickly. Over time, I became OK with the fact that my healing would come in heaven rather than on earth. Of course I’d love to be healed before I die, but if not, then I was OK with that. I knew beyond a doubt that God would continue to be with me every step of the way. That was what living faith looked like to me.
And God has been with me every step. He has strengthened me when I was weak. He’s comforted me when I was alone because I didn’t feel up to leaving the house. God surrounded me with a loving, caring family who have been there through the difficult days. I am so blessed and thankful.
Learning from having a chronic illness
Having a chronic illness has taught me many things. I’ve made friends I wouldn’t have otherwise and I’ve done work I wouldn’t have otherwise. One of my best connections has come through the IC Network, a group who advocates for IC patients and works to educate and help us. I am blessed to write for them regularly as I have been for the past nearly 20 years.
My work has also given me the ability to do research about IC and learn about the latest treatments and theories. I’ve interviewed leading researchers in the field and listened to their presentations at various urology conferences. I spent my 40th birthday at a urology conference and loved it. Each urology conference I went to was overwhelming to me to see medical professionals working hard to find answers and help for us.
I’ve seen treatment for IC come a very long way through the years. I could give you all sorts of details and information that I geek out over, but I will refrain. However, this very research has led me to different urologists through the years. My local urologist has been so kind and good to me. I’ve seen a handful of them who have been far from kind and helpful. This urologist has been so compassionate and helpful, but he doesn’t specialize in IC.
So I have driven out of town and out of state in order to seek out urologists who are leading experts. I was more motivated to do this after having children when I had a newfound desire to feel the best I could to be able to do more with them. The Women’s Urology Center at Beaumont Hospital in Michigan blew me away. I’ve been there a few times and had a couple of surgeries there and am thankful for their help and compassion.
Doing article research, though, also led me to interview people in related fields. In researching an article about Pelvic Congestion Syndrome, I connected with an Interventional Radiologist. During the interview he said to me, “I think I’ve found a cure for IC.” I was polite, but internally I scoffed. I’ve heard promises of cures for years and none of them ever panned out.
After the article released, he and I stayed in contact a little bit. I mentioned to him that the patients he was describing had histories a lot like mine. He sent me his patient questionnaire. I completed it, and he told me over the phone that he suspected I had blocked veins in my pelvis that were causing my symptoms. He told me he truly thought he could help me feel better. I remained skeptical. I was wary of getting my hopes up and being disappointed yet again.
Undergoing another procedure
The doctor I interviewed referred me to his colleague who sent me for imaging to determine if I had blocked pelvic veins. Lo and behold, I did. My left iliac vein was 70% blocked. His solution was an outpatient procedure to put in a stent. By that time, I’d had three major pelvic surgeries and four minor ones. What was one more? So in March of 2021, I spent my kids’ spring break out of town having an 11 mm stent inserted into my left iliac vein.
I didn’t feel any difference at first. Of course at first my pain was much worse, but it was overall the least painful recovery I’ve had for any procedure. Life returned to my version of normal. Then about 10 months in, I started noticing that I hadn’t been having my usual bladder symptoms for a while. A couple of months later, I tried going off of the bladder medication I had been taking since I was 23 (other than while nursing or pregnant). It was the same medication I took for about a year during middle school as well.
That was six months ago. I haven’t had any trouble since then. None. I am going to the bathroom the same amount of times as a “normal” person. I’m not even having to be as vigilant about the things I eat. (Foods and beverages often flare IC symptoms.)
Remission or healing?
So where does that leave me now? Am I in remission or am I healed? Honestly, I’m not sure. I just know that I feel well. I still have other chronic health issues that have come up through the years that cause me trouble and pain, but for the first time, my bladder isn’t at the top of the list. That is so incredibly significant in my life.
When my local urologist told me a couple of weeks ago that I don’t need to come back unless I start having problems, it began to really sink in to me that this is real. I called my mom on the way home from the appointment, and we both cried. I had made peace with the fact that my healing would be in heaven. But here I am on earth right now not having to struggle as much.
While I’m perhaps in a bit of shock, but I just praise and thank God. He is the One who led me to connect with the work I do and the doctors I’ve met. He has been with me every single step of the way.
Can my symptoms return? Yes. I’ve certainly learned that nothing with my health is a guarantee. But maybe my bladder symptoms really were caused by the lack of blood flow to my bladder. Having that blood flow restored and allowing time for my bladder to heal itself may be what worked for me in the end.
Long ago I had to learn to enjoy the good days without stressing about the bad days that were sure to come. (It’s an important lesson when you have a chronic illness.) Right now, I’m going to enjoy the good days. I’m going to praise God for taking care of me as He always has. I’m going to bask in His goodness and rejoice over finding relief I never expected to come.
For years, I’ve waited for this. I keep thinking it is too good to be true, but recently seeing my urologist and his reaction helped me understand even more that this is real — at least for now. God was with me in the wait and surprised me beyond what I could have hoped for so many years later. My heart is full of gratitude today!
A series of easy, quick and healthy summer dinner ideas you’ll love
Summertime dinners often need to be quick and easy. Some days are busy with activities and others are just busy spending time as a family or even being a bit lazy! I love summer dinner ideas that are pretty healthy while also being quick and easy. We have central air conditioning, but I still like some dinner ideas for summer that don’t require use of the oven or stove.
So I’m running a series for a few simpler summer dinner ideas over the next few Tasty Tuesdays. I’d love to hear from you and any suggestions you have for what you make for your family during the hot days of summer!
With that in mind, I’m excited to share the first simple summer dinner idea my family enjoys: a DIY salad bar. One of the things I love most is that I can prepare ingredients ahead of time and then just pull them out at dinner for easy, quick serving.
DIY Salad Bar
For a DIY salad bar, put all the salad fixings out on your kitchen counter and let each family member build their own tasty salad. It’s pretty straightforward, and you can totally customize it with what you family likes. I like to get some special salad treats for us that we don’t always have like sunflower seed kernels or a salad topper mix. My husband also loves the crunch of chow mein noodles on his salad, so I include those as well. (And leftover chow mein noodles can be turned into yummy butterscotch haystacks!)
Our salad bar toppings often include the following:
Lettuce
Shredded cheese
Boiled egg
Diced onion
Diced bell pepper
Diced tomatoes
Shredded or chopped carrots
Diced cucumbers
Turkey or ham
Pepperoni
Croutons
Bacon bits
Chow mein noodles
Sunflower kernels
Various salad dressings
My salad bar toppings are often diced because that’s how I prefer them, but obviously you can do them however you like! As you can see from the photo below, I put out the ingredients and let each person fend for themselves. We are not at all fancy with this. In fact, sometimes if I’ve just cleaned the lettuce, it’s laid out on paper towels across the counter to air dry a bit!
You can make your life easier and buy pre-cleaned lettuce or salad mix if you want. I usually get a head of iceberg lettuce, which is what my family likes most, and then plan other meals around the same time that use lettuce like tacos or BLT pizza.
Salad bar sides
I do usually serve up something on the side when we do a salad bar at home. Check out these ideas to go along with your salad bar:
Crescent rolls
Garlic bread
Texas toast
Crackers (oyster, saltine, butter, etc.)
Fresh fruit
Homemade bread (This happens less often around my house!)
Basically, my favorite salad bar side is something I can use to scoop out the residual salad dressing that’s left in my bowl when I’m finished eating! I love a good salad dressing. My all-time favorite is poppyseed salad dressing. It’s so sweet and yummy!
Serving up salad for picky eaters
I’ve mentioned quite a few times that I have some particular eaters in my family. For example, when I make delicious pecan crusted chicken for dinner, my particular eaters would rather have frozen pizza or peanut butter sandwiches. Neither of them like chicken.
So for DIY salad bar nights, I get a little creative. My husband is a fan of salads and salad bars, so that only leaves my son as a picky eater. His biggest complaint is lettuce. He just doesn’t like lettuce. Instead I make him a deconstructed salad with some of his favorites like pepperoni, cheese and croutons. Usually I stick some baby carrots on his plate as well, but we were out of them for the most recent DIY salad bar night we had. And then he’s happy with whatever is on the side. This time it was crescent rolls.
Simple sweets
And then if you’re going with simple summer dinner ideas, you need a simple sweet as well. For DIY salad bar nights, it seems wrong to eat something heavy or rich. Plus hot weather calls for lighter foods, I think. So if I make a sweet for us, it’s usually either oat and honey granola or peanut butter honey nut cereal clusters. I’m a little partial to peanut butter honey nut cereal clusters for simple summer dinners because they only use the microwave and not the oven.
What are your family’s favorite simple summer dinner ideas?
Plus a free printable Father’s Day coloring card page!
Finding the right Father’s Day gift is often challenging for me. One of the things I’ve learned through the years is that personalized Father’s Day gifts are often the most memorable. My husband likes gifts that show we know him well and want to give him something related to his interests. On Father’s Day, that focuses on our kids!
So rather than try and come up with all sorts of generic Father’s Day gifts ideas this year, I’ve put together a list of last-minute personalized Father’s Day gifts that he’s sure to love. And I’m including a free printable Father’s Day coloring card page to get you underway as well. It works as a gift by itself or paired with another gift.
If you’re looking for a personalized Father’s Day gift that doesn’t have to be ordered in advance, doesn’t cost much and you can have immediately, then digital downloads (aka printables) are your best choice! Listen, I create printables that I both give away for free and sell on the Families with Grace Etsy store, so I am totally partial to them. But they make adorable gifts that you can easily personalize for the dad in your life. And they work incredibly well in a time crunch! I’ve pulled together a list of my best personalized Father’s Day gift printables that are inexpensive and memorable.
Father’s Day printable coupons
These Father’s Day printable coupons are adorable. Two pages come pre-filled with ideas, but they also come with a third page that is blank so you can write in whatever works best for the dad in your life! The prefilled coupons include things like: a quite morning to sleep in, a car wash, one day without chores, playing a game together and a made-to-order breakfast.
Father’s Day handprint art
Another great choice is handprint art. Not only is it adorable, but it’s fun for dads to hang on to and look back to how small their kiddos’ hands were. All you have to do is print them on cardstock, add your child’s handprint and give it to dad! You can put it in a frame for safe keeping.
Of course the handprints on this artwork is personalized, but you can also find Father’s Day handprint art that is personalized to your guy’s hobbies and interests. There’s handprint art pages for those who love baseball, fishing, gaming, superheroes, music and more.
Father’s Day coloring pages
Even better is to pair the handprint art with a matching coloring page to give dad two personalized Father’s Day gifts he’ll love without breaking the bank. You can give just the coloring page as a card as well — whatever works best for your family! Just like with the handprint art, you can also get a variety of hobbies to make the coloring page card even more personalized. There’s handprint art pages for those who love baseball, fishing, gaming, superheroes, music and more.
But if you’re not looking for a specific hobby, there are some more general coloring pages that work for many father figures and dads as well. They become a personalized Father’s Day gift when your kiddos color them!
And then there are also bundles of Father’s Day coloring pages that make great cards and can be a good activity for a Sunday School class or your own kiddos.
Another fun and easy printable that your kiddos can make a personalized Father’s Day gift is printable bookmarks they color in and make just right for dad.
A surprisingly easy weeknight chicken recipe your family will love!
When it comes to meat, chicken is my all-time favorite. I really like bacon, but chicken is what I can eat pretty much any time. I think that’s because it’s so versatile. During our recent home meal kit delivery service trial, I found quite a few chicken dishes I fell in love with. One of them was a pecan-crusted chicken recipe. But, the recipe and ingredients were harder to come by not using the meal kit, so I played around with it and figured out my own version that’s just as tasty!
Besides the chicken, you just need a few ingredients to pull of this super easy and delicious weeknight chicken dinner. This is the kind of dinner that makes me feel like I’m eating out.
When I make this recipe, I use two chicken breasts to serve just my daughter and me. My husband and son don’t like chicken, so they have something else. However, I’ve written this recipe to make four chicken breasts or servings to feed a family of four. You can adjust it up or down as needed for your own family.
Prepping for the chicken
Get your oven preheating at 450-degrees with the rack in the center. Then, since it’s pecan-crusted chicken, you may need to prep pecans. If you’ve bought pecan pieces, you don’t have to do anything. I got pecan halves most recently (I store them in the freezer to keep them fresh), so I had to break them up. You can use a knife, your fingers or even a food processor to break them into smaller pieces. You need 2/3-cup of roughly chopped pecans for four chicken breasts.
Once your pecans are ready, melt 2 tablespoons of butter in your microwave and then stir in the pecans, 1/2 cup Panko (I used seasoned Panko, but either works), salt and pepper. If you want a strong flavor, you can also stir in 1/4 to 1/2 teaspoon Montreal steak seasoning. While the mixture should be moistened, it should remain with a crumbly texture, like so:
Putting the chicken together
Once your pecan mixture is ready, it’s time to move on to the chicken. If your chicken is frozen, make sure it’s thawed. For even cooking times, I usually pound my chicken inside a paper towel or plastic wrap with my hand or rolling pin, because I have yet to get a meat mallet! Either way, I try to get the breasts to a similar thickness.
Pat your chicken dry with paper towels and place it on a baking sheet liberally coated with non-stick cooking spray or covered with parchment paper or non-stick aluminum foil. I went the non-stick aluminum foil route for easy clean-up of this pecan-crusted chicken recipe.
Season your chicken breasts with either 1 teaspoon total of Montreal steak seasoning or just use salt and pepper. When I made it the first time on my own, I used the Montreal steak seasoning because I had it for another recipe and figured I’d give it a try. It is a strong flavor, though, so spreading 1 teaspoon among four chicken breasts is more than enough.
Next is one of my favorite flavors to go with chicken: honey mustard! I use premade honey mustard salad dressing, because we eat it around my house anyway.
If you don’t have honey mustard, you can make your own with 4 tablespoons mayonnaise, 4 teaspoons honey and 4 teaspoons Dijon or yellow mustard. Either way, you want to top each chicken breast with honey mustard. I used about 1 teaspoon of honey mustard per chicken breast, swirled it on top and then used a spoon to spread it.
These photos are from when I over-seasoned the chicken with Montreal steak seasoning. Your chicken should not be this covered with seasoning!
Finally, you add the pecan crust to the chicken. Use a spoon to pile the pecan mixture on the top of each chicken breast and cover it well. Press down a bit to make sure it sticks. You only need to put the pecans on the top.
That’s it. Stick your pecan-crusted chicken into the preheated 450-degree oven for 15 to 20 minutes until the crust is brown and the inside middle of the chicken is at least 165-degrees.
Make it a dinner
While the pecan-crusted chicken bakes, I usually prep our sides to go along with it. One of our favorite pairings is oven-roasted broccoli and mashed potatoes. I have learned that scratch mashed potatoes aren’t nearly as difficult to make as I once thought, but to make weeknights easier, I usually make boxed or pouch mashed potatoes. It makes for a delicious plate of food!
1teaspoonMontreal steak seasoning or salt and pepper
4teaspoonshoney mustard salad dressingor mix 4 tablespoons mayonnaise, 4 teaspoons honey and 4 teaspoons Dijon or yellow mustard together
Instructions
Preheat your oven to 450-degrees (F) with the rack placed in the center.
If you are using pecan pieces, skip to the next step. Otherwise, use a knife, your fingers or a food processor to break your pecans into pieces. They don't have to be small, but they do need to be at least roughly chopped.
Melt the 2 tablespoons of butter in the microwave.
Stir the pecans, Panko and some salt and pepper into the butter. If you want an extra kick, sprinkle in some of the Montreal steak seasoning as well. It should form a moist, yet crumbly mixture. Set it aside.
Use your hand or a meat mallet to pound your chicken to the approximately same thickness. (A rolling pin also works. I suggest putting the chicken in paper towels or plastic wrap to do this.)
Pat the chicken dry with paper towels then place each chicken breast on a baking sheet liberally sprayed with non-stick cooking spray or lined with either parchment paper or non-stick aluminum foil. (I go the non-stick aluminum foil route for easy clean-up.)
Season the top of the chicken with the Montreal steak seasoning by spreading the 1 teaspoon among the four chicken breasts. Or season the chicken with salt and pepper.
Put about 1 teaspoon of honey mustard on top of each chicken breast; use a spoon to spread it over the top of the chicken.
Mound the pecan mixture on top of each chicken breast and press down gently so the mixture sticks. You only need to coat the top side.
Place the chicken in the preheated oven and bake for 15 to 20 minutes until the crust is browned and the inside center of the chicken is at least 165-degrees (F).
When I learned I was pregnant with my first child, I was excited. I was also overwhelmed and nervous. Some people are just naturally great with all kids. (In fact, that same first child of mine is that way!) I was never that way. I was not sure what motherhood would actually be like, but I was excited to be part of it. Not once did I think about how grumpy I’d be with my baby. Instead, I planned to be a grace-filled parent. I planned to be calm, have a sense of humor and show lots of love.
The reality of parenthood sets in quickly. Those first few months were exhausting and an adjustment beyond anything I could ever have prepared for. Parenthood is a total upheaval of life. Added to the exhaustion is stress and pressure and it’s a perfect mix for cranky parents. But none of us what to be those cranky parents. We desire to be a grace-filled parent who is patient, caring and loving.
I’ve never been a perfect parent, just as I’m not a perfect person. I have stories about my behavior that make me cringe and feel ashamed. However, I’ve also worked (and had God work in me!) to become a more grace-filled parent. I’ve learned through my years as a mom that my kids need grace from me as much as I need grace from them. Today I’m sharing 10 lessons I’ve learned about how to be a more grace-filled parent.
1. Listen to your children.
From the time they are babies, our kids are using their voices to tell us what is going on with them. True, they start out with crying that can be perplexing. (I remember the days of trying to sort out what could possibly be making my baby unhappy when they were clean, fed and well rested and still crying sometimes!) But once they start talking and expressing themselves, we get to learn about them and their point-of-view.
Understanding where they’re coming from can help you have more patience with your kiddos and give them more grace as a result. I remember when my daughter was 3 and spilled an almost full bottle of hand soap on the hallway carpet. I was angry that she’d made a mess and didn’t understand why in the world she was carrying the soap dispenser out of the bathroom. She explained to me that she wanted to show our new Minnie Mouse soap dispenser to the Minnie Mouse toys in her bedroom. Oh my heart!
She still got in some trouble, and we definitely talked about how soap dispensers stay in the bathroom, but her punishment wasn’t as severe because I understood where she was coming from. She wasn’t just carrying around soap for no reason and trying to make a mess. Listening to her helped me understand her and address what was really going on.
2. Observe your kids.
But, kids don’t always express themselves with words. Sometimes their feelings are too big or they just plain don’t have the words. I mean, I’m just over four decades into my own life and still can struggle to find the right words to explain how I’m feeling sometimes! Sometimes we need to stop and observe our kids to figure out what is really going on with them and why they are behaving a certain way.
Recently my parents were in town for a visit. (They moved away last winter.) We made a quick trip to the grocery store for just a couple of things. My son stood in the chip aisle and argued with me for a moment about buying Cheetos. I get it. I love Cheetos, too, but I told him we had some at home and to stop being difficult. Indeed I was frustrated. Later that evening, my dad mentioned to me that my son had noticed all the rest of us had picked up some sort of snack or something to purchase and seemed to be feeling left out. It made perfect sense as I looked back on the situation. I wasn’t a very grace-filled parent in that moment, but I did at least understand my son a bit. He never said he was feeling left out; however, his actions told the story if I’d have just paid closer attention.
No matter what, of course my son shouldn’t be allowed to argue with me. If I had realized what was really going on with him at the time, though, I could have reacted differently and resolved the situation in another way. I could have suggested he pick another snack instead. Just two minutes after the Cheeto disagreement, I did concede to getting a box of Cheez-Its at my son’s request that both my kids love. His attitude disappeared after that.
3. Communicate with your kids.
Another way to be a more grace-filled parent is to communicate with your kids. Listen, my kids talk a lot. A lot. But, what I mean is to actually communicate with them. Let them know what plans are for after school or what you expect from them on an outing. Just a few sentences ahead of time can help them also understand you better and allow you both to have more patience with and grace for each other. It helps you avoid yelling at your kids or getting otherwise upset with them.
For example, as my children have gotten older, they have had more plans for what they want to do during their downtime. My daughter may be planning to come home after school and spend a couple of hours writing. Or my son might be looking forward to playing with a friend in the neighborhood when he gets home on a nice day. If I throw a wrench into their plans with an extra activity, that can lead to grumpy attitudes at the least and meltdowns at the worst. Simply communicating about plans ahead of time helps tremendously.
My husband and I also talk with our kids about why they are being punished or when we observe a behavior we don’t like. Of course there are times they get in trouble immediately, but other times we have found it’s helpful to communicate with them about why we are unhappy with what’s happened. Communication really does go a long way!
4. Know when to discipline and when to hug.
The definition of grace is not getting what you deserve. Meaning if I do something wrong, you show me kindness instead of anger. Being a grace-filled parent means that sometimes when our kids do something wrong, we let it slide or give them a hug instead of a punishment.
I mentioned in point two that my parents moved away last winter. Their move a few states away has been a big adjustment for all of us. So when they headed back out after visiting us recently and my youngest had a difficult attitude the next day, I gave him a bit of grace. He needed grace and love more than discipline in that moment.
When we are listening to and observing our kiddos, we can more easily discern when they are just out of sorts and need love and attention more than punishment.
5. Remember that you are a teacher.
One of the biggest jobs we have as parents is to be our kids’ teacher. We teach them everything they know about navigating life through our words and actions. Remembering that we are teaching them is an important part of being a grace-filled parent. Our kids are still growing and learning. If we take the time to teach them rather than just get mad at them, we’re all happier in the end.
Our goal is to help them grow and learn. Growing and learning are difficult when we’re being yelled at or in trouble. Instead, use some mistakes as teaching moments. I’ve also learned to expect that I will have to repeat myself and repeat lessons. My kids are kids. They aren’t perfect and they’re not going to always remember what to do in a moment.
6. Set realistic expectations.
When I expect more from my kids than they are capable of, then I lose my patience and my feelings of grace. One trick I’ve learned is to remind myself how old my kids are when I start to impose unrealistic expectations on them. If I stop to think that my daughter is only 12 or my son is only 9 when they mess up, then I can realize when I’m expecting them to act like adults.
I also set expectations out loud to my kids when we are going into situations. For example, if we are going to visit a friend, I remind them I expect them to help clean up toys and not give me a hard time when I say it’s time to leave. When they know what I expect of them, they are more likely to behave accordingly.
7. Guard your time.
I cannot say enough how important guarding your time is. I’m an introvert, so finding downtime comes naturally to me. Both introverts and extroverts need to be wary of overscheduling. Who can be a grace-filled parent when you are stressed out trying to get everyone in multiple places at the same time every night of the week? (Maybe some of you can, and that’s awesome. But I know I sure can’t, and I don’t think I’m alone.)
I’d rather say no to an activity than lose my patience with my kids. We started in elementary school with the rule our kids can do only one regular activity per week. That changes as they get older and can both handle more and stay up later. But it’s what works best for us, and I gladly stick to it.
8. Have fun together.
Eight months old. That’s the age that babies start getting more interactive and you can have a bit of fun with them. (Or at least that was our experience.) From that point on, find ways to have fun with your kiddos. Do things they enjoy with them and let yourself go and enjoy them, too. Now that our kids are older, we enjoy playing games together. When we go to the playground, I swing with the kiddos (unless the swings are busy or other kids want to swing). Just have fun.
We are much more inclined to give grace when our children need it when we have good feelings of making good memories with them. Find ways to sincerely enjoy spending time with your kiddos. Parenting is a lot of work and requires a lot of us, but don’t forget to enjoy moments along the way!
9. Ask for help.
Another important thing to remember about being a grace-filled parent is that you aren’t meant to do it alone. Start always with asking God for help. I pray daily to be the mom my children need. In fact, this parents’ prayer is a great place to start.
Other times you need to ask for help from those around you: your spouse, your extended family, friends and even your kids! For example, I am the one mostly in charge of laundry in our family. Sometimes I get overwhelmed, more frustrated and certainly less grace-filled when I am sitting with a pile of laundry surrounding me that needs to be folded. I’ve learned to make laundry a family chore. I get it gathered, washed and dried, then we all fold it together and everyone is responsible for putting away his or her clothes.
10. Apologize when you mess up.
Being a grace-filled parent doesn’t mean you always have it together. You aren’t perfect. Along the way, you’re going to mess up. Let your kids see what it looks like to mess up gracefully. Apologize to them when you are wrong, because sometimes you are. I have gotten short with my kids for no good reason other than being tired or cranky or whatever. And then I tell them I’m sorry. I want to model asking for forgiveness for them as well as reminding them none of us are perfect.
Looking for more grace-filled posts? Don’t miss these!
An incredibly easy and delicious taco pizza recipe you’re family will love!
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Two of the most popular foods my entire family likes are tacos and pizza. So when I came up with the idea for this taco pizza recipe, I was pretty sure it would be a hit. While it isn’t a replacement for either tacos or pizza, it’s definitely a great way to shake up dinner.
I love recipes that are easy and delicious. This taco pizza recipe is both. While we ate it as the main course for dinner one weeknight, you could also serve it as an appetizer or bring it along to a potluck. It’s also be a great snack for watching sports if that’s your family’s thing.
Originally I was trying to come up with another way to use a crescent roll crust like my BLT pizza recipe does. My daughter loves BLT pizza, but my husband wanted something different. And so this taco pizza recipe was born. And, as you might guess, it all starts with a crescent roll crust!
The crust
I suppose you could use regular pizza dough for this recipe, but the crescent roll crust gives it a buttery, flaky goodness that just can’t be beat! For our family of four, I used two cans of crescent rolls spread out on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper (easy clean up!). I smushed the seams together decently enough. It really doesn’t have to be perfect!
Once it’s prepped, then you bake it in your preheated oven according to the temperature your crescent rolls say. I have found the crust usually bakes 3 to 5 minutes longer than it takes for the rolls to bake. Check your crust after the suggested time has passed and work from there. You want the crust to be a nice, golden color like this:
The meat
While your crust is baking, cook your meat. I used about one pound of ground chuck for my family. You could use more or less depending on what you family likes. You could also make this with chicken if you’d rather! I used some cooked and frozen crumbled hamburger that I had in my freezer this time to make prep even easier. I thawed it in the microwave and then popped it into one of my beloved Rachael Ray non-stick skillets.
Once the meat was warm, I added taco seasoning and water. I used Old El Paso taco seasoning with 1/4 cup of it and 2/3 cup of water. I let it simmer for the flavors to come together well. Basically, season your meat however you would for tacos. Let it simmer while you prep the other ingredients and wait for the crust to bake.
The “sauce”
Every pizza needs a sauce and this taco pizza recipe is no different! I decided to go with a sour cream sauce, much like what my taco cornbread bake uses. To make fewer dishes, I mixed 1-1/2 cups of sour cream, 1/2 cup of shredded cheddar cheese and 1/2 cup of diced onion in my 2-cup measuring cup.
When the crescent roll crust was finished baking, I pulled it out of the oven and smeared the sour cream sauce all over the top of it. Then I put it back in the oven (at the same temperature the crust baked at) for 3 minutes to let the cheese start getting melty.
Putting the taco pizza together
Your taco pizza is ready to assemble once you’re finished baking it with sour cream. First, spoon your meat evenly over the top of the sour cream.
Next, crumble up nacho cheese flavored chips. I used classic nacho cheese Doritos. You could use cool ranch or spicy flavors as well — whatever your family prefers. I had two individual bags of nacho cheese Doritos, so I squeezed them in the bags before opening them. Easy peasy! If you have a larger bag, just put the chips into a zip top bag and use your hand to break them up.
Once your chips are broken up, spread them evenly over the top of your taco pizza.
Optional garnishes
The pizza is ready to cut and serve as is. There are some garnishes you might like to add, though. I kept out some extra diced onion that my husband and daughter added on top of theirs. My daughter and I also drizzled a bit of Western salad dressing on top of our slices. Honestly, this kicked the flavor from good to great, so I highly recommend it! Adding some shredded lettuce and tomato on top would also be delicious.
Preheat your oven to the suggested temperature on your crescent rolls.
Open the crescent rolls and spread them out on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper or sprayed with non-stick cooking spray. Pinch the seams together to form one large rectangle. Bake in the oven for 2 to 3 minutes longer than suggested until the crescent roll crust is a golden brown.
Meanwhile, crumble and cook the ground beef in a skillet.
Add in the taco seasoning and water; let the meat simmer.
Stir together the sour cream, cheddar cheese and diced onion.
When the crescent roll crust is finished baking, spread the sour cream mixture evenly over its top and place it back in the oven at the same temperature for 3 minutes.
Remove it from the oven and evenly spoon the meat over the top of the sour cream mixture.
Evenly spread the crushed nacho cheese chips over the top of the meat.
Garnish with French salad dressing, shredded lettuce, diced tomato and/or extra onion as desired. (NOTE: I highly recommend the French salad dressing for this!)
12 Bible verses to encourage and uplift you when you feel like giving up (With a free printable!)
One of the things I struggle most with is discouragement. Not only am I hard on myself, but I can easily get down on myself and start thinking that what I’m doing isn’t making a difference. I feel ready to give up on the task before me. Being completely honest, I’ve felt like giving up on this blog before. Every single time I start questioning whether I’m using my time wisely by pouring so much of myself into this, God reassures me that I am. Sometimes through music, sometimes through others, sometimes through a devotional and sometimes through His Word.
Turning to God and His Word is always the best place to start when you are feeling like giving up. But, I don’t always do that first. Through the years, I’ve learned to turn to Him sooner; however, it’s not always my first stop. I kind of like to wallow in self-pity a bit. So to help keep myself on track, I decided to look up some Bible verses for when you feel like giving up. I wanted to remind myself that God is for me, and He has a purpose for me. And so, I’m sharing those verses with you today.
Let them be a reminder to you (and to me!) that God is with us. He is for us and always has a plan for our good. His Holy Spirit will strengthen us each step of the way. If we are breathing, we have purpose. If the journey is difficult, we are growing. God is on the move, even when He feels far away.
Download a PDF with all 12 verses for free!
“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” — Galatians 6:9 (NIV)
What if you give up the day before God has a big move planned? How sad that would be! God’s timing is always right. Sometimes we just have to keep waiting and working until it is time for harvest. This verse reminds us that we will be blessed if we don’t give up.
“Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.” — Hebrews 12:3 (NIV)
If anyone had reason to give up, it was Jesus. He was beaten and punished while being completely innocent. Jesus is the Son of God and perfect, but He was also fully human. I have to think He was tempted to give up at times in His ministry. But He didn’t. He endured and pressed on to complete His purpose so that we might be saved. Our goal is to be like Jesus, so let us continue on even when we feel like giving up.
“And as for you, brothers and sisters, never tire of doing what is good.” — 2 Thessalonians 3:13 (NIV) “The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him.” — Psalm 28:7 (NIV)
I combined these two Bible verses for when you feel like giving up, because they go together. When I think about the command to not get tired of doing what is good, I know I can’t do that fully on my own. It’s less that I’m tempted to sin and more that I just plain get tired and weary. My burdens grow heavy and I get overwhelmed. But, verses like Psalm 28:7 remind me that I don’t have to do it on my own. God is with me. He is my strength and my shield. If I trust in Him, then He will help me. That is, indeed, something for which to praise Him!
“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” — Isaiah 41:10 (NIV)
This is my all-time favorite Bible verse. I’ve already shared it in six previous blog posts, in fact. But I have to share it again. When I feel like giving up, it isn’t necessarily that I’m afraid. So for this, I cling to the second sentence of this verse. God says He will make us stronger, help us and hold us up. I love to imagine myself snugly in the palm of God’s hand feeling strong, loved and protected. And when I do that, then I no longer feel like giving up.
“I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” — Philippians 3:14 (NIV)
Who doesn’t like a prize? This Bible verse reminds us that if we continue working toward the goals and purposes that God has for our lives, then He will reward us. He is not some miserly boss who wants us to work hard for meager pay. Jesus told us He went to prepare a place for us in heaven. That is the greatest prize and reward we have to look forward to.
“He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” — Philippians 1:6b (NIV)
The tasks God has given you to do He has given you for a purpose. Those tasks may seem small, like day-to-day care for our families. Or they may seem big, like running a ministry. But no matter what, God began a good work in you. He won’t stop now. He will continue His good work in you until it’s complete and you are with Him completely. We don’t have to give up when we know that we aren’t walking alone on our journey.
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” — Joshua 1:9 (NIV)
Being strong and courageous is sometimes more than we can manage on our own. Our strength and courage falter and we want to throw in the proverbial towel. But, we can rest in knowing that God is always with us and will always be with us wherever we go. We don’t have to be afraid or discouraged, both of which are two good pals with giving up!
“He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall;but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” — Isaiah 40:29-31 (NIV)
I couldn’t narrow this one down to just a single verse. This whole section is full of encouragement. When we feel like giving up, we are weary and weak. Those feeling don’t make us lesser than. In fact, even the youngest and strongest get weary and fall. But, trusting and hoping in the Lord will strengthen us. He replenishes our strength. And, here’s what I really love. In true God fashion, these verses promise not only that He will give us strength, but He’ll give us strength beyond what we ask for. We will be able to keep going and not get weary. In God, we can soar like eagles.
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” — Matthew 11:28 (NIV)
Nobody feels like giving up when they are energetic and on top of the world. So, I had to include Matthew 11:28 with the Bible verses for when you feel like giving up. Maybe instead of giving up, what you really need is a break. Run to Jesus. He will catch you, hold you and give you the rest you need. Then you will be renewed to keep going.
“Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters.” — Colossians 3:32 (NIV)
If I’m working on something just for myself, I am much more tempted to quit. But if I’m doing something for my husband or children, I’ll keep going even when it’s uncomfortable and exhausting. (Remember the days of having a newborn? Talk about exhaustion!) So if I think about how all the work of my hands is actually for God, then I am incredibly motivated to keep going. I want to give Him my very best since He has given me everything.
“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.” — Hebrews 12:1-2a (NIV)
Who do you know or have you known that was a person of God? Someone who you knew was so in love with God that He radiated through them and all they did? Those people are examples for us. None of them were perfect. Not a one! But, we can still look to them for encouragement. I like to think of my grandparents and uncle hanging out in heaven and rooting for me to keep going on the journey God has for me. Regardless, I know that Jesus is rooting for each and every one of us:
Go, go, go! You can do this! You’ve got this! Here, take the Holy Spirit! He’ll help you! Keep going! I can’t wait until you get to the finish line and I can throw my arms around you! Go, go, go!
Download a PDF with all 12 verses for free!
Looking for more Bible verses and encouragement? Don’t miss these posts!
Cook-at-home kits taught me a few lessons I’ll continue to use even if I don’t continue to use the kits!
When my daughter first proposed trying cook-at-home kits a few months ago, I was certainly hesitant to give them a try. But now, after trying multiple meal kit services, I’m glad we did so! I wanted to wrap up the series with my overall thoughts, lessons learned and what we’ll do in the future.
(And, as a reminder, I have no affiliation with any of the meal kit service providers and am earning no commission from any of them. These are just my own opinions about Dinnerly, Hello Fresh, Home Chef, Every Plate and EMeals.)
One cook-at-home kit that didn’t work
Of all the cook-at-home kit services we tried, only one didn’t work out at all. Others I liked at varying degrees, but Blue Apron just wasn’t a fit for my family.
While we didn’t actually receive meals from Blue Apron, it wasn’t for lack of trying. In fact, when I saw Blue Apron offers a two meal plan a week, I decided to try them. I looked at the menu and found it iffy. But I decided to take the plunge and sign up anyway.
I discovered that some of the menu items I saw before signing up that looked good were only offered in two-person portions. And I couldn’t change portion sizes within the same box. All of them had to be the 4-serving selections. There were only eight recipe options I got to pick from by eliminating fish, lamb and shellfish.
Its website was the most cumbersome of the ones I used and not very user friendly overall. I couldn’t find meals that worked for my family. The prices seemed higher to me for what I was getting as well. Once I was clear that Blue Apron wouldn’t work for us, I wanted to cancel my subscription. I found that in order to do so, I have to email Blue Apron’s customer service. I did so, but I find that to be quite annoying. All the other cook-at-home meal kit services had options for me to click in my account to cancel or indefinitely pause my service.
The features I liked
Cook-at-home kit services definitely have likeable features. For the most part, food shows up at your door in the right portion sizes and is ready for you to cook. Some of the services made this easier than others. Overall, my favorite cook-at-home meal kit service was Home Chef. It gets props from me in that it allowed me to pick only two meals a week (best for my family), adjust the portion sizes for all selections I made and had the easiest to cook recipes of all the services that delivered food to my door.
I didn’t know these things would be a draw going in, but I quickly learned they made a big difference after I tried a few other services. Your family may not care as much if you three meals a week is the smallest amount offered or if all meals come in the same portion sizes. But, for our family it really made a difference and fit our needs the very best.
Assessing the cost
Along with concerns about whether we’d find enough foods we like in cook-at-home kit services, my other biggest concern was the cost. For each service I tried, I listed the cost in detail in the individual review posts (see links in the second paragraph or at the end.) Almost all of them offered discounts for new subscribers, but the discounts were distributed over multiple weeks, so they were much smaller on a weekly basis.
Because Home Chef was my favorite, I contemplated whether to continue with it once we were done with the cook-at-home meal kit service reviews. I even found that I could opt to get a delivery every other week or once a month. Being allowed to skip deliveries, it could be even further in between, I suppose. But what I ended up with was a box with two meals for my family (one of which was only two portions because half my family wouldn’t eat it and would need other food prepared for them) that cost around $67. I could take my family of four out to dinner twice a week for the same amount. It just doesn’t seem worth it to me in the end. So, I have indefinitely paused my service.
I know part of the fee for the cook-at-home kits is paying for the ingredients and the convenience. For my family, though, I can get the ingredient locally for less and don’t mind picking them up with my regular weekly grocery order anyway. The cook-at-home kits aren’t made to replace our entire grocery shopping for the week, so they weren’t saving me a trip to the grocery store either.
The one service I’m keeping — at least for now
While I’m not keeping any of the meal kit delivery services, I am keeping EMeals — at least for now. That’s in part because when I subscribed to the service, I had to pay for three months at a time and that time hasn’t ended, yet! But, I am thinking I will continue to use EMeals even after that and renew my plan.
I like that EMeals is cheaper and has way more food options that work for my family. It also uses more convenience items that make getting dinner on the table on weeknights much easier for me. When I first tried EMeals, I didn’t think I’d stay with it. Pinterest and other websites basically do the same thing for free. But, I found that EMeals makes finding new recipes and figuring out what ingredients I need much faster and easier. I don’t get bogged down by too many recipes like can sometimes happen to me online.
EMeals helps me stay creative and out of a rut, which I like. And it fits much better in my budget at $30 for three months. (It does offer an option to pay $60 for a year, which I will do if we continue to like and use it as much as we have been these last couple of months!)
The lessons I’ve learned from cook-at-home kits
I don’t regret trying the cook-at-home kits at all. This experience has changed the way I cook and meal plan — both for the better! We are trying new recipes on a weekly basis now (usually two new recipes a week). I have gotten outside of my comfort zone for cooking and made all kinds of foods and recipes I hadn’t made before. The cook-at-home kits taught me some kitchen skills I hadn’t used before.
I’m now pretty dang good at peeling garlic, cooking chicken and roasting vegetables. I’ve figured out how to meal plan entire meals rather than just main dishes. And my family learned that making two separate meals once a week isn’t so difficult. My husband and son are more particular eaters. Cook-at-home kits got me in the mode of making one meal a week that I knew the guys wouldn’t like for just my daughter and me. I put in a frozen pizza or make something very easy for the boys on those nights. Everybody is happy.
I have also learned that cooking from scratch is tasty, but it isn’t always practical for my family. Some of the cook-at-home kits took me at least an hour at prepare. On weeknights, especially, that’s just too much for it to be on a regular basis. I don’t want to use all convenience, prepackaged food, but I’ve found a happy medium.
Finally, using the meal kits also helped my family eat at home more and enjoy what we’re eating even more. They certainly got us out of a dinner rut. And that’s always a good thing!
What have been your experiences with cook-at-home kits? I’d love to hear from you!
I first wrote this post about how God is good back in June of 2014 when my kiddos were toddler and preschool age. Remembering that God is good is always timely. Considering this post talks about them both being sick is even more timely for me right now since they are again both sick at the same time. Thankfully right now they are just dealing with head colds and don’t need nearly as much help at 9 and 12 as they did at 17 months and 4 years!
About two years ago my son came down with a virus. Considering the dude is 17 months old, I might be exaggerating. It was actually last Friday, but since my daughter has since come down with the same virus and it lasts about a week, time is passing a bit slowly for me right now.
The good news is that neither kid has been hit super hard with this virus, just enough to make them tired, a bit grumpy and clingy. It could be way worse. However, it’s also highly contagious. Somehow they shared their germs with my mom who hasn’t seen them in more than a week. Fortunately no one else has come down with it. We’re staying in and missing out on a good week of activities to keep our germs to ourselves. Maybe by this weekend we’ll be all clear of contagions. I can’t wait. Sick kids aren’t super fun, but being sick isn’t super fun, so I don’t blame them.
The exhausting everyday moments of parenthood
Last evening, though, my son was feeling better but still grumpy. He started getting back into things he hasn’t in weeks, like the dog’s water dish, over and over again. Then he was climbing on the table. He wanted to simultaneously be in my lap and on the floor. My daughter wanted to play. Her ideas were having me mimic her dance moves. I was tired. It had been a long day. It was the kind of day that lasted longer than my patience. I debated about loading everyone in the car in their pajamas just to go for a ride. I didn’t care where, I just needed to be out of the house and not have someone hanging off of me.
It was also raining. My husband had recently repaired a gutter and went outside to check on it. Lucky duck, I thought. At least he got to get out of the house. (My son might not have been the only grumpy one!) He came back in and said he had something neat to show our daughter. She slipped on shoes with her nightgown. I scooped up the baby and we went out, too. It was raining, but we have a covered patio. The “neat thing” my husband had to show off was an intricate spider web. My son couldn’t care less, I didn’t care much and my daughter thought it was pretty cool. However, we were out of the house! We sat on the patio, listening to the rain on the metal roof for a little while. It was the change of scenery that I think we all needed.
Finding joy in the simple things
Sometimes it’s the simple parts in life that make it so good. I wouldn’t say that this has been an overall great week. It hasn’t be horrible and could definitely have been worse, but it also could certainly have been better. My daughter is missing out on her first experience with Vacation Bible School thanks to being sick. She has literally been counting down the days for a month and was looking forward to having me be with her leading around the preschoolers. I was looking forward to her having fun and learning more about God. She is so very interested in God and Bible stories right now. She has a love for Him that makes my heart burst. I don’t want to quash that. I want to encourage and nurture that. And I thought VBS would be one way to do that.
However, God had different ideas. I’d be lying if I said I understood completely or knew what He was thinking. I don’t. In fact, I’ve cried about it this week a couple of times. I’ve prayed about it. As soon as my son got sick, I prayed that somehow my daughter and I wouldn’t so we could still go. I firmly believe God heard my prayer; He just said no. Sometimes “no” is a hard answer to hear. I think I’m more disappointed than my daughter is. But, I do know that always God has a plan. God is good and always in control. I can trust Him even when hardships — whether small or big — don’t make sense.
I’ve learned that lesson time and again, even when I doubt. I’ve learned that in living with a chronic illness when I’ve not understood reasons for suffering. And I’ve learned that when proverbial doors not only closed on me but slammed shut in my face and smashed some fingers in the process. God doesn’t always make sense.
In my humanity, I sometimes get mad about it. Sometimes my feelings get hurt. Sometimes I get so frustrated that in trying to do the right thing and making choices God has led me to make that I still can get punched in the face with a hardship. It’s not always fair. But, God never said life would be fair and therein lies the rub. Therein lies the difficulty.
God is good
However, I have learned that even when life doesn’t make sense, God does make sense. I have told my daughter time and again that she doesn’t always need to understand why my husband and I ask her to do something, she just needs to do it because we said so. (Trust me, the girl wants us to explain everything all the time and sometimes she just needs to trust us.) Just like I’d never lead my children astray, just like I have valid reasons for disciplining them when they do something wrong, so God does the same for me. At the end of the long, hard day — even through my hurt, frustration and tears — all I have left (all I really had to begin with) is to trust God and lean fully on Him.
I can look back now other major hardships in my life and see how God worked them for my good. I can look back at other hard times and still not understand them, but I trust that just like I look out for my children, He is looking out for me. My toddler and preschooler can’t understand as much as I do at age 35. I can’t understand as much as God does as the maker of the universe and creator of everything in it. I just have to trust in One Who loves me more than I can fathom.
And so even in small hardships like having temporarily sick kiddos who are missing out on things they were looking forward to, I can trust. I can know that God really does work all things to the good of those who love Him even when little things (and big things!) don’t make sense.
While I wouldn’t mind a bit of a break in the craziness of life this week, I am working to be thankful in all circumstances at all times. Because God is good all the time. He is ever faithful.
