Families With Grace

Helping Christian moms create homes filled with grace, love & faith

A gratitude and prayer journal for Christian women

“The Christian Woman’s Gratitude Journal” helps you manage anxiety and grow closer to God!

In the past, I’ve had so much luck using a gratitude journal and using a prayer journal. I also love devotionals. And I enjoy inspirational quotes.

But I’ve never had them all together in one place — until now. “The Christian Woman’s Gratitude Journal” is my latest book release that combines a gratitude and prayer journal into one. You’re going to love it as much as I do!

Through the years, I’ve used prompted and blank journals to help manage my anxiety and grow in my walk with God. So, I’ve included both in one journal, because it just makes sense to me.

Somedays even I as a writer need prompts to get my going. Other days, I have thoughts waiting to pour out of my head and onto paper.

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The benefits of a gratitude and prayer journal

Throughout my lifetime I have struggled with anxiety. If I’m being completely honest, I know depression and anxiety have gone together at different times in my life. I have never stopped trusting in or believing in God. In fact, I’ve found anxiety and faith can co-exist and that doesn’t make me a bad Christian or mean I don’t trust God.

However, I don’t want to get stuck in those places. I have been stuck before and had my faith shaken. Healing after some of the most difficult times in my life has best been done at least in part by focusing on the things for which I’m grateful.

Not only did that give me an attitude shift in general, but doing so also helped me to see God’s goodness and blessings in the midst of the struggle.

The Bible tells us:

“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” (NIV) And, quite frankly, that’s easier said than done in some circumstances. Keeping a gratitude journal helps us remember to truly give thanks, even on the difficult days when we are struggling to see any good.

1 Thessalonians 5:18

What is a prompted gratitude journal?

When I think of writing prompts, I tend to think of language arts classes. Maybe you do, too. But, when it comes to journals, writing prompts aren’t designed to elicit long essays or short stories. Instead, they are often just simple.

In “The Christian Woman’s Gratitude Journal,” the prompts are designed to take no more than 5 minutes a day total per page. You’ll find three different types of prompts in this gratitude and prayer journal.

“List Three” prompts

Throughout the journal are 30 different “List Three” writing prompts. These are lines for you to list three of something for which you’re grateful. So, the first time I did a gratitude journal, I didn’t use a prompted version and really struggled some days to think of three new or different thinks for which I was thankful.

The “List Three” prompts are themed to make it easier for you. Here are some examples from “The Christian Woman’s Gratitude and Prayer Journal:”

  • List three ways you’ve felt God’s love this week.
  • List three of your favorite beverages.
  • List three of your biggest blessings.
  • List three of your favorite movies.
  • List three happy moments from the day.

“Question” prompts

The gratitude and prayer journal also includes one “Question” prompt. Thirty questions total are included. These are questions you can answer usually in just one or two sentences. But, if you need more writing space, 10 lined pages with inspirational quotes at the top are included after three pages of prompts.

The “Question” prompts also help you focus on something in particular that is positive or for which you are thankful in your life. Here are some examples:

  • How did you feel love from someone else today?
  • What made you laugh today?
  • What is your favorite Bible verse and why?
  • Where and when were you able to spend time with God today?
  • What did you accomplish today that makes you feel proud?

“Today’s Mood” checklist

Also on the prompted pages of “The Christian Woman’s Gratitude Journal,” you’ll find a checklist to mark off your mood for the day. It’s straightforward and easy. The following moods are included: happy, sad, angry, anxious, excited, afraid, lonely, jealous, calm and disgusted.

What is a prayer journal?

Along with the three writing prompts on 30 of the pages, the gratitude and prayer journal also include a box simply labeled “Prayers.” This space is designed for you to use however you’d like and can change from one entry to the next.

You can use the space to do any of the following (or whatever works best for you!):

  • List prayer requests for the day.
  • List praises for the day.
  • Write a prayer for the day.
  • Track prayers God has answered.

What else is included in the gratitude and prayer journal?

Along with 60 different writing prompts over 30 pages that have mood and prayer boxes as well, “The Christian Woman’s Gratitude Journal” also includes 10 lined pages that have inspirational quotes at the top. All of the quotes are original ones. For example:

  • Find something in each day that makes you happy.
  • You are important. You are special. You are smart.
  • Doing the best you can doesn’t mean you have to be perfect.

You’ll also find 10 devotionals throughout the gratitude and prayer journal as well. These are paired next to the blank journal pages to give you space to write about them if you would like. The devotionals are uplifting and helpful in both spiritual and practical ways. You’ll find topics such as:

  • Three ways to be kinder to yourself
  • Understanding God’s love for us
  • Prayers for women

Get your own copy here:

"The Christian Woman's Gratitude Journal" cover image
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Moms with Grace: Mandy Farmer

Tips for Christian moms with a good dose of encouragement

Affiliate links are used in this post, if you make a qualifying purchase via my link, I receive a small percentage of the sale at no additional cost to you. I only recommend products and services I use and love. It helps support my blog, so thank you for your support! Read my full disclosure here.

The “Moms with Grace” series takes a look at modern Christian moms and how they handle daily life with raising children. You’ll find monthly posts from moms with older kids, younger kids and all those in between. Let real-life moms encourage and uplift you!

Today is the kick-off for the “Moms with Grace” series. Mandy Farmer is the featured Mom with Grace this month. Mandy has a blog, “Mandy and Michele,” for which I have shared guests posts a few times. I am thrilled to share her story with you.

Mandy is a 62-year-old mom to four children ranging from 26 to 48. The oldest two belong to her husband from a previous marriage, but Mandy has raised them completely since they were 9 and 14 and lost both their mom and sister in a car accident.

Her experiences as a mom and stepmom (though she says they never use the term “step”) are uplifting to those of us still in the thick of everyday life with kids. Mandy has survived the young years and is now reaping the benefits in her relationship with her children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren!

Please share a little bit about your background. Are you married? If so, for how long? What is your occupation? 

I was born near Canton, Ohio, and raised on the family dairy farm. At the age of 13, we moved, cows and all, to Wisconsin where I graduated from a small high school. I acquired a B.A. in computer science at Asbury University outside of Lexington, KY and went to work in Columbia South Carolina for about five years.  

At that point, my pastor’s wife introduced me to Michael Farmer, a pastor in her hometown of Barnesville, Ga. Michael had recently lost his wife and daughter in a fatal car accident. He had two boys, 9 and 14 at the time. She had been after me for months to go to Georgia with her and meet Michael. I didn’t think I was interested in a pastor with two boys but I finally went…just to get her to quit bothering me about it. 

Four months later, we were married! Now 32 years married!  

Fun note: I said I didn’t want to be a farmer’s wife or a pastor’s wife…I married Pastor Farmer! 

We added another boy and girl to the mix and continue pastoring around Georgia and for six years in Milwaukee, Wis. – my home state. 

I never worked outside the home or church after marriage and my degree quickly became obsolete, but my education was well worth it. 

I jumped full-time into my love of children’s ministry. Homeschooled our two youngest and founded a homeschool co-op. In between that, sometimes I served as Michael’s secretary. 

In 2011, I was struck with chronic pain. This changed a lot. Our daughter was 15. She became chief cook and bottle washer, making most meals, doing the laundry, keeping the house. She also, became my chauffeur! In 2016, we retired and moved to Savannah, Ga., and I began writing.

At first, I wrote about chronic pain and then I moved into writing Bible Studies for our denomination and an online group called Gracefully Truthful. Last year I decided to try to publish a book of devotions. That is still in the works, but in the learning process I wrote a children’s picture book about milk cows: Holly the Holstein Talks About Milk Cows.  I will publish another picture book about a family whose mommy has Fibromyalgia. You can follow me at my writing website to keep abreast of my publishing. 

How have you changed from the beginning of your mom journey until now? 

Another piece of my backstory is that I was number three of six children growing up. My youngest brother was 12 years behind me. My mom had a bookstore, so I did a lot of caring for him. This gave me a great deal of knowledge about childcare. I loved being a mom, and I can hardly wait to have grandchildren. (Our oldest has children and grands, but they have always lived far away.) 

Our children are all grown now. We live in the same city. Two kids are married. They all pop in all the time to check on us. Our oldest has two grown sons and a daughter. And we have six great-grandchildren! 

What are some challenges you’ve faced as a mother? How have you worked to overcome them? 

My initiation into motherhood started right off with a preteen and teenager. One got the chicken pox while Michael and I were on our honeymoon, and the other got them when we arrived home!  

My husband and I sat down with them before we married and talked about things. They wanted me to adopt them but because of moving several times it never happened. Michael told them that I would end up being their mother longer than their biological mother. And we decided they would call me “Mom.”  

Michael said he would always back me up when it came to discipline, and they were not to try to play us against one another. What I said would be “law” and if I dealt out a punishment, only I could change it. We had some of the typical teenager-mom issues. But really not many big issues that all moms don’t have.  

I love them like my own, and they love me the same. As a matter of fact, one of them sends me flowers every year on the anniversary of their mother’s death. The card always reads, “Thanks for being my mom.”

In what ways have you and do you share your faith with your children?

It’s a lifestyle. Everything seems to have something to do with faith in our lives. We have had many discussions around the dinner table. (Dinner table: what an important routine for the family!) 

Being a pastoral family, our kids were saturated in our faith. I wanted to have a family devotion time, but my husband felt that they got so much from being at the church A LOT that he didn’t want to do it. I did get them to have Advent devotions with me most years. We also homeschooled our children, and they received Bible training through that. Our church had children’s and teen’s Bible quizzing, and we were deeply involved in quizzing. 

Once they were old enough, they were involved in any special programs we had at church. They enjoyed every minute…well, maybe not every minute. 😊 

Pray for and with your children. After the car accident, going to school was very traumatic for Brian. He was dropped to his school that day and the accident happened on the way to the high school. We ALWAYS prayed with him before he got out of the car. ALWAYS.  

What are some of your favorite parts of motherhood? 

I loved it all. From as long as I can remember, I wanted to be a mom. I was involved in their lives and they in mine. I loved cooking and baking with them from an early age. Also, I taught them music, and we played and sang together often. Homeschooling was wonderful. I was nervous about it at first. But my sister was doing it, and so I tried kindergarten (which wasn’t required) and we enjoyed it. That was the year my daughter was born and it gave Brett and me bonding time. If Mikaela was fussy, she was in a snuggly around me which left my hands free to teach. I think she learned a lot that way, school came easier for her. We considered every year what we would like to do the next year. Every year the kids chose to homeschool. 

How does grace play a role in your daily life? Do you have any tips or advice for how moms can show more grace to their families? 

3 John 1:4 image

Oh, goodness! Grace. Grace is the central theme. There are always mistakes made. On my side and theirs. Apologies and forgiveness are vital in a good family relationship. 

When discipline is necessary, it’s a good time to talk about the forgiveness of God. Be sure to tell your child how much you love them and that discipline is for teaching. Never discipline when you are angry. Always pray with your child after discipline. 

 What are you most proud of as a mom? 

 ”I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.” – 3 John 1:4 (NIV)

All four of my children are serving the Lord in some capacity. Daniel is on the church board and serves in so many basic ways. He does a lot of those things that no one notices – lawn care, general checking on the building, usher. Brian served as a pastor in a small church for about 10 years until his health failed. Brett is the tech guy. He runs the sound and live stream at church. Mikaela and her husband serve as youth ministers and are both on the worship team. 

Do you have any resources that help you be a mom with grace?

You have to have a strong marriage to have a strong family. 

These are some of the parenting books I highly recommend:

Do you have anything else to add that we haven’t talked about? 

Prayer is a big key. Pray for guidance and wisdom. Pray for your children and their future spouses. Be specific as much as you can. Pray more than “Be with my child today.” Ask for wisdom and knowledge and protection. If they are attending public school, pray even harder. 

Make sure your children know that their parents love each other. Yeah, they might get disgusted, but let them see you hugging and kissing occasionally. This makes your child feel safe.  

Tell them you love them every day! Hug them even when your teenager doesn’t want you too. 

Have rules and abide by them. Children need boundaries. Back each other up. 

Connect with other Christian moms for support and encouragement in the private Facebook group, Moms with Grace!

Fudgy chocolate cake recipe

The best chocolate cake recipe you’ll ever make!

I love all things chocolate, but I’ve struggle with chocolate cake. So many times, I get bakery chocolate cake that is dry. Ugh. While I’ve tweaked a chocolate cake mix with great results, this fudgy chocolate cake recipe tops them all hands down. It’s a mic drop sort of cake.

My parents don’t even eat chocolate cake and they love this cake. Same for my husband. It’s just its own level of yum! It’s somehow airy yet moist. And it just plain works. So, when I made it most recently for my son’s birthday, I knew I had to share it on the blog.

Usually I only make this chocolate cake recipe for birthdays, because we don’t have cake too often at home. Unfortunately, my daughter opts for Oreo ice cream cake for her birthday in October. But my son asks for this chocolate cake for his January birthday, and I always make it for my own birthday in May. I can hardly wait the two more months until my birthday!

And, I also encourage you to try this recipe even if you haven’t made a cake from scratch before. This is literally the only cake I make from scratch. Usually I do just tweak a box cake mix with awesome results, but this one is worth making from scratch. I promise you can do it — and you don’t even need special cake flour or other uncommon ingredients. In fact, I’d guess you have everything you need to make this cake in your kitchen right now!

Making the fudgy chocolate cake recipe

Like any baking recipe, start by preheating the oven. Turn the oven to 350-degrees and then prepare your baking pan(s). I usually bake this cake in a 9×13-inch pan, but this time I used to 9-inch cake pans to make a layer cake for my son. He wanted the cake to look like the one in a video game he likes.

Grease the pans or spray them with non-stick cooking spray, and then dust them lightly with flour. I use non-stick cooking spray because it’s easiest — and at least a bit healthier!

Sprayed and lightly floured cake pans ready for this fudgy chocolate cake recipe

Next, stir together 2 cups of white sugar and 2 cups of all-purpose flour in a large mixing bowl. I use the bowl of my stand mixer, because this is the bowl you’ll be mixing the batter in later.

The flour and sugar mixed together in the bowl of my stand mixer for this fudgy chocolate cake recipe

Let the flour and sugar hang out while you get out a medium saucepan. Put 2 sticks of butter, 1 cup of water and 3 tablespoons of cocoa powder into the saucepan over medium heat.

The butter, cocoa powder and water in a medium saucepan of medium heat
Part way through cooking the butter, cocoa powder and water in a medium saucepan of medium heat

You want to bring it to a boil so that the liquid is bubbly and moving around. While I wait for it to boil, I move on to the next step of whisking 1/2 cup of milk, 1 teaspoon of vanilla, 1 teaspoon of baking soda and 2 eggs together. I measure the milk into my 2-cup measuring cup and then add in the rest of the ingredients. It’s easier to pour that way and I don’t end up with a dirty measuring cup and a dirty bowl!

The milk, vanilla, baking soda and eggs mixed together in a 2-cup measuring cup for this fudgy chocolate cake recipe

When the butter, water and cocoa powder reaches a boil, then it’s ready to remove from the stove.

The boiling cocoa powder mixture

Pour the boiling mixture into the bowl with the flour and sugar mixture.

The boiling cocoa mixture poured over the flour and sugar mixture

Stir the flour mixture and cocoa powder mixture together by hand or using a mixer. I use my stand mixer to make life easier. If you are using a mixer, start out on low speed until the ingredients have combined a bit before moving to medium speed to mix completely. If you start out too fast, then the boiling cocoa powder mixture will splash out. When it’s all combined the mixture will be loose.

The flour mixture and cocoa powder mixture all combined for this fudgy chocolate cake recipe

Add in the egg mixture and keep stirring or mixing until it’s incorporated. I usually add this in slowly while the mixer is running.

Once the egg mixture is incorporated, the cake batter is ready. It is going to be a thinner consistency than you might expect for cake batter, but that’s exactly correct!

The chocolate cake batter ready to be poured into the prepared cake pan(s)

Pour the batter into your prepared cake pan(s), and place them in the oven.

The filled cake pans ready to go into the oven.

Bake for 25 to 30 minutes for two 9-inch pans or 30 to 35 minutes for a 9×13-inch pan. You’ll know the cake is finished when it begins to shrink away from the sides.

The baked fudgy chocolate cake shrinking away from the sides of the pan.

Let the cake cool for 10 minutes before removing it from the pan.

The finished cake out of the pan

Let it cool completely before topping it with icing. This time around, I used my favorite quick, easy and oh-so-delicious homemade buttercream icing. I tinted it for the color to match the cake in the video game and did the swirl design in white like the same video game cake.

The completed and decorated fudgy chocolate cake

Look at the airy, yet moist inside of this fudgy chocolate cake recipe!

The inside of the completed fudgy chocolate cake recipe is both airy and moist!
Chocolate cake recipe Pinterest image 3

Fudgy chocolate cake

This is the all-time best fudgy chocolate cake recipe. It's both airy and moist. And this chocolate cake is way better than a bakery one!
Prep Time 20 minutes
Cook Time 30 minutes
Total Time 50 minutes
Course Dessert
Cuisine American

Ingredients
  

  • 2 cups white sugar
  • 2 cups all-purpose flour
  • 1 cup butter or margarine
  • 1 cup water
  • 3 tablespoons cocoa powder
  • 1/2 cup milk
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla
  • 1 teaspoon baking soda
  • 2 eggs

Instructions
 

  • Preheat the oven to 350-degrees (F). Prepare on 9×13 or two 9-inch cake pans by spraying with non-sticking cooking spray or coating with grease and then lightly sprinkling with flour.
  • In a large mixing bowl, combine the flour and sugar, then set it aside.
  • In a medium saucepan over medium heat, combine the butter, water and cocoa powder. Stir occasionally and cook until it comes to a boil.
  • While you're waiting for the cocoa powder mixture to boil, whisk together the milk, vanilla, baking soda and egg. Set aside.
  • Remove the boiling cocoa powder mixture from the stove and pour into the large mixing bowl with the flour and sugar. Stir together by hand or use a mixer to combine them thoroughly. (If you're using a mixer, be sure to start on low until the liquid has combined a bit before turning the mixer to medium.)
  • Once it is combined, pour in the egg mixture and mix until that is completely incorporated.
  • Pour the prepared batter (which will be relatively runny) into the prepared baking pan(s).
  • Bake in the oven for 35 to 30 minutes for 9-inch pans or 30 to 35 minutes for a 9×13-inch pan. You'll know the cake is finished when it starts to pull away from the edges of the pan.
  • Cool for 10 minutes before removing the cake from the pan. Cool completely before icing the cake.
Keyword Birthday cake, chocolate cake, fudgy chocolate cake, holiday baking, homemade cake, layer cake, scratch made

Find more delicious family recipes like this one in the “Favorite Recipes from Families with Grace” cookbook. Download your FREE copy today!

Favorite Recipes from Families with Grace cookbook
The Favorite Recipes from Families with Grace is a cookbook for modern families filled with easy-to-make, kid-friendly recipes you’ll love! #Cookbook #FavoriteRecipes #Freebie #DigitalDownload #WhatsForDinner #WeeknightDinner

20 Spring break activities and ideas for at home

You don’t have to leave home for spring break fun!

Though spring break can be a time to travel, it can also be fun at home. Whether you’re staying home by choice or for budgetary reasons this year, these spring break activities will keep your family entertained and making memories. No need to pack a suitcase!

Before you start

The first rule is you have to treat spring break at home like a vacation. That means no chores! OK. You are going to have to do some basic chores like dealing with dirty dishes and preparing food. You may even have to do some laundry. But do your best to treat the time like you would if you weren’t home.

You also can designate your staycation days if you aren’t able to take the entire week off. Just plan for your spring break activities on Monday through Wednesday or whatever works best for your family. Whatever you pick, communicate about it so you, your spouse and your kids are on the same pages and know what to expect.

Another neat idea that we’ve done in the past and are doing again this year is a combination vacation and staycation. We’ll spend a couple of nights away on a family trip and then a few days at home for spring break. It’s the best of both worlds and, quite literally, what my children opted to do this year when we gave them choices.

Our family does like to have a meeting ahead of time to talk about what we’d most like to do. This helps us to prioritize our time and our budget for spring break activities. You can give your kids a list to pick from or just ask them for their ideas or both.

Finally, remember simple activities can be just as fun as more complicated ones. My kids’ biggest requests for the staycation part of our spring break this year were going to eat hibachi for lunch and playing games together.

1. Go see a movie.

We love movies in my family. Whether you go to the theater or watch something at home, a good movie is a great spring break activity. Find a movie you’ll all enjoy, have snacks at the ready and enjoy!

2. Check out local exhibits.

My family lives in a mid-sized Midwestern city. We’re not overwhelmed with choices of exhibits to visit, but there are always a few things going on. In fact, we have one art exhibit we’ve been talking about checking out and haven’t found time for. Spring break is a great time to make that happen.

3. Explore other nearby cities.

Because we do live in a city that’s not so big, exploring nearby bigger cities is a good option. We can drive an hour north or south and be in bigger cities that have more activities and things to do. Then, we come back home and sleep in our own cozy beds. Where you go will depend on what you do, but think about children’s museums, zoos, aquariums and any other family friendly venue.

4. Eat out.

Thanks to meal planning, preference and time constraints, my family only eats out on Sundays after church. Some weeks we have another meal out as well, but we don’t eat out very much these days. When we travel, though, we definitely eat out more often. So, another great spring break idea for at home is going out to eat. Go somewhere special or different. Or try a new restaurant.

5. Have a board game day, afternoon or evening.

We love playing games in our family. They can be a great way to pass the time and make some great family memories. Use games you already have, buy a new one or make one up.

6. Try out a new recipe.

Spring break can be a great time to try out a new recipe together as a family. Even better, find a recipe your whole family can prepare together like pizza subs, peanut butter honey nut cereal clusters or puppy chow. For even more awesome family recipes, be sure to get the “Favorite Recipes from Families with Grace” cookbook for free!

Spring break activities Pinterest image 3
If you’re staying home this year, these spring break activities will keep your family entertained and making memories. No suitcase needed! #springbreak #staycation #familyactivities #familyfun

7. Set up an obstacle course.

During remote learning, we had a gym assignment to set up an obstacle course at home. It was easier than I’d expected and we had way more fun with it than anticipated. Since then, we’ve done this a couple of other times. Use your chairs, pillows and whatever you have around to make a simple obstacle course. If you want, time each other to see who can do it fastest.

8. Have an indoor campout.

If you live somewhere warm, you can have an outdoor campout if you want. But for those of us in colder weather, an indoor campout is a much better spring break activity. Pull out sleeping bags, air mattresses or whatever works and sleep in the same room together. We used to campout in our living room, but now we campout in our bedroom.

9. Buy some “souvenirs.”

Our kids love buying souvenirs when we travel. They don’t have to be big purchases, but just something. Make souvenirs a part of spring break at home. Hit up the Dollar Tree and let them pick something. Or budget a set amount of money for souvenirs and head to their favorite store(s). Don’t forget a little something for yourself and your spouse, too!

10. Go to the playground.

Going to the playground can be a great spring break activity to help burn off some energy. Keep a check on the weather and pick a good time to go. Let your kids pick which playground they want to go to and plan to spend an hour letting them have fun. Be sure to get involved with them. (Personally, I love swinging with my kids!)

11. Play video games together.

If you’re a video gaming family, play together. Recently, my son was so excited to play Minecraft with both my husband and me. It was a treat for him to share that with us, and we all had fun with it.

Another great video game option is to have one person be in charge of the controller and everyone helps decide what he or she does. For example, we once had a blast playing Monopoly on the Xbox. My husband had the controller and we played against computer players. Our whole family talked strategies and made decisions for what to do in the game. It was incredibly fun!

12. Go to the library.

Libraries are awesome resources and can be great fun, even over spring break. If your town or city is small enough, chances are the library probably has some spring break activities of their own planned with extra story times and crafts. Check out those events or even just go and get some books to read together or individually (or both!) over break.

My kids always liked to play at the library when they were smaller. Our libraries offer a variety of toys and imaginative play items that are a hit. Explore the toys the library as well.

13. Try geocaching.

Geocaching was super popular a few years ago, but it still around now. We’ve had some fun with geocaching as a family. (It can also be a great date idea for parents!) Download a geocaching app and find locations around you. We’ve been surprised at the places we’ve found items. Our kids really enjoy it.

14. Get crafty.

Crafts aren’t really my jam, but small art projects together as a family can be fun. Color together at the kitchen table, use some of the craft kits you inevitably have stockpiled in your house, make cards or sweet crafts to send to grandparents or whatever you enjoy.

15. Volunteer.

Spending time together helping others is a great spring break activity. Not only do you get a chance to impact your community, but you show your kids the importance of helping others and get that warm. fuzzy feeling as a result.

16. Have a family yes day.

Having a family yes day can be great fun for kids and adults alike. Pick a day where you say yes to whatever your kids ask to do. We’ve done this a few times and do have some rules. For example, the kids can’t ask us to travel out of town or spend more than a set amount of money on something. We’ve been pleasantly surprised, though, at how well they work together and the fun activities they come up with. (Read more about how to have a family yes day.)

17. Make videos.

Speaking of family yes days, during our most recent one, we made movies together. My daughter and I paired up and my husband and son paired up. Each pair picked a song for the other to lip sync and make a video to. We had so much fun making the videos and then watching them together!

18. Have a cake decorating contest.

Our family enjoys watching baking shows on television. (Well, my son doesn’t so much if I’m being honest!) Seeing contestants bake and decorate cakes is especially fun. So we tried our hand at it. I baked a cake in two pans like it would be two layers. Each pair got a cake and a bowl of homemade buttercream icing. We picked a design to copy (a cartoon bear) and got to work. Without telling them who decorated which cake, we sent photos of the final versions to my parents and my husband’s parents to pick the winner. But, you don’t have to pick a winner.

And you can use store-bought cake, cupcakes or cookies along with canned icing to make it even easier. No matter what, it’s a great spring break activity that results in having some sweet treats!

19. Plan intentional one-on-one time.

When our two children were really young, we started having what we called “one-on-one playtime.” We’d set a timer for 30 minutes and separate so each child got one parent for a half hour. Then we’d switch kids and parents. During their 30 minutes with each parent, our children got to pick what we played. It’s a bit different now that they’re 10 and 13, but they both still enjoy having us to themselves. Spend the time talking, playing, reading or whatever you like to do to connect with each other.

20. Be lazy.

We all need downtime. Some of my favorite memories with my kids come when we are being lazy together. Put down electronic devices and see what you come up with wanting to do. Maybe you talk or make silly jokes. Maybe you put on a talent show or have a dance party. Unstructured time with our kids can result in the most awesome moments!

The best baked mac and cheese with Ritz cracker topping

You’ll never have a better baked mac and cheese than this one inspired by a restaurant in St. Louis!

Nearly two years ago, we took a family vacation to St. Louis. We had a great time exploring the city and making lots of family memories. We also tried some incredible food. The hamburger from Hi-Pointe Drive-In was fabulous. Cookies from Insomnia Cookies hit a sweet spot. Floats from Fitz’s Root Beer were in their own category of sweet treats.

But, hands down, the most memorable for me was Salt + Smoke BBQ. My daughter and I went there solo while the boys ate elsewhere. The barbeque was good. Stupidly good. However, the baked mac and cheese with Ritz cracker topping stole my heart.

I literally said to my daughter as we were eating, “If I wasn’t already married to your dad, I’d marry this mac and cheese.” That may sound dramatic, but the mac and cheese really was that good. (I’m not even a big mac and cheese fan.)

Since we live a few hours away from St. Louis, I knew my odds of having that baked mac and cheese with Ritz cracker topping again were slim. If we go back someday, I’ll definitely hit it up. But until then, I’ve found and tweaked a recipe that tastes incredibly similar.

This baked mac and cheese with Ritz cracker topping has become a regular for Thanksgiving dinner at my house. I’ve served it to up beside sloppy joes. Most recently, I made it as a main dish and enjoyed every single bite of it. So much so that I seriously debated having its leftovers for breakfast the next day. You have got to try this simple recipe that only uses six ingredients (besides a bit of salt and pepper)!

Baked mac and cheese with Ritz cracker topping ingredients: triple cheddar shredded cheese, heavy whipping cream, flour, pasta shells, butter and Ritz crackers

Stovetop prep for the baked mac and cheese with Ritz cracker topping

Salt the water in a large pot and let it come to a boil, then add the pasta and cook until al dente, about 12 minutes. While the pasta cooks, preheat the oven to 300-degrees (F). The Salt + Smoke mac and cheese uses pasta shells, so that’s what I have used. You could use any pasta shape you prefer.

About four minutes before the pasta is finished getting, melt 2 tablespoons of butter into a medium saucepan over medium/high heat.

Butter for the baked mac and cheese with Ritz cracker topping melting in a medium saucepan over medium/high heat

When the pasta is finished cooking, strain it and return it to the pot, removed from the heat. Once the butter has melted, stir in 2 tablespoons of all-purpose flour. Cook for 1 to 2 minutes, stirring constantly. Here’s how it will look start to finish:

The flour and butter starting to be mixed for the baked mac and cheese with Ritz cracker topping
Add the flour to the melted butter.
Part way through mixing the flour and butter for this baked mac and cheese with Ritz crackers recipe
Stir the flour and butter constantly for 1 to 2 minutes.
The flour and butter mixture completely mixed together after cooking for 2 minutes over medium/high heat
How the butter and flour mixture looks when it is finished cooking.

Once the flour and butter are well combined and cooked together, begin adding in the heavy cream about 1/4 cup at a time. Let it mix in each time completely before adding more. It will go from a texture of runny oatmeal to mashed potatoes to pudding to sauce.

Starting to stir in the heavy cream for the baked mac and cheese with Ritz cracker topping
Adding the first 1/4 cup of heavy cream into the flour and butter mixture looks a bit like runny oatmeal.
Continuing to gradually stir the heavy cream in for this baked mac and cheese with Ritz cracker topping
As you keep adding, the cream, it starts to be more of a mashed potato consistency.

Once the cream is completely stirred in and the mixture is more sauce-like, continue cooking it over medium/high heat, stirring frequently. When it just starts to move around a bit, remove it from the heat. Do not let it boil. It will look like this:

The cooked sauce removed from the heat for this baked mac and cheese with Ritz cracker topping

Next, stir in 8 ounces of shredded cheddar cheese. Salt + Smoke uses white cheddar, I think, but I use triple cheddar blend because it’s easier for me to find. Add a dash of salt and pepper.

Stirring the cheese into the sauce for this baked mac and cheese with Ritz cracker topping
Pour the shredded cheese into the sauce.
Stir well until the cheese melts completely.

Getting it ready to bake

Once the cheese sauce is totally together, pour the sauce over the cooked and strained pasta.

The cooked pasta with the cheese sauce poured over the top of it for this baked mac and cheese with Ritz cracker topping

Stir together the sauce and pasta so it is well mixed and all the pasta is covered.

The pasta stirred together and coated with the cheese sauce for this baked mac and cheese with Ritz cracker topping

Transferred the coated pasta into a 9×13-inch baking dish, lightly sprayed with non-stick cooking spray. Use a spoon to spread it evenly throughout the dish.

The prepared mac and cheese being spread into a 9 x 13-inch baking dish

Crush the Ritz crackers for the topping and spread over the top of the prepared mac and cheese. I use about 8 to 10 Ritz crackers for this. I have store brand ingredients for everything except the crackers, because the buttery flavor of Ritz really does work best for this recipe. (Please note that I am in no way affiliated with or sponsored by Ritz crackers.)

The baked mac and cheese with Ritz cracker topping ready to go into the oven

Bake it in the preheated 300-degree oven for about 12 minutes until heated through. I often serve this with additional crackers on the side for added crunch if people want. Be sure to refrigerate any leftovers.

I promise this will become your favorite baked mac and cheese recipe! Look at this cheesy, yummy goodness!

A finished dish of the baked mac and cheese with Ritz topping
The cracker crust gives just a hint of crunch and extra buttery-ness!
A forkful of the finished baked mac and cheese with Ritz cracker topping
Doesn’t that just make your mouth water?!
Baked mac and cheese with Ritz cracker topping Pinterest image 4

Baked mac and cheese with Ritz cracker topping

This baked mac and cheese with Ritz cracker topping recipe is the best ever. With only 6 ingredients, it will quickly become a favorite!
Prep Time 20 minutes
Cook Time 12 minutes
Total Time 32 minutes
Course Main Course, Side Dish
Cuisine American
Servings 8 people

Ingredients
  

  • 1 pound medium pasta shells
  • 2 tablespoons salted butter
  • 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
  • 2 cups heavy whipping cream
  • 8 ounces shredded cheddar cheese
  • 8-10 Ritz crackers crushed
  • salt & pepper to taste

Instructions
 

  • Bring a lot pot of salted water to a boil. Add the pasta and cook until al dente, about 12 minutes.
  • Preheat the oven to 300-degrrees (F).
  • About four minutes before the pasta is finished cooking, melt 2 tablespoons of butter in a medium saucepan over medium/high heat.
  • Add 2 tablespoons of flour to the butter and cook for 2 minutes, stirring constantly.
  • Drain the pasta and return it to its pot off the heat; set aside.
  • Slowly add the heavy cream to the butter and flour mixture. Stir in about 1/4 cup at a time, waiting until it's completely mixed in to add more.
  • Once the cream is all added, continue cooking over medium/high heat, stirring frequently, until the liquid starts to move. Do NOT let it come to a boil.
  • Remove the pot from the heat and stir in the 8 ounces of shredded cheddar cheese until completely melted and smooth. Add a dash of salt and pepper. (If you use unsalted butter, you may need to add more salt.)
  • Pour the cheddar cheese sauce over the cooked and drained pasta. Mix well so the sauce covers all the pasta.
  • Spritz a 9×13-inch baking dish lightly with non-stick cooking spray. Pour the pasta into the baking dish and spread it out evenly.
  • Crush the Ritz crackers by hand and sprinkle evenly over the top of the pasta.
  • Bake for 12 minutes until heated through. Serve immediately, and enjoy!
Keyword baked mac and cheese, carry-in, carry-in recipe, Christmas, family dinner, family friendly, family recipe, kid friendly, mac and cheese, macaroni and cheese, potluck, salt + smoke mac and cheese, Thanksgiving, weeknight dinner

Find more delicious family recipes like this one in the “Favorite Recipes from Families with Grace” cookbook. Download your FREE copy today!

Favorite Recipes from Families with Grace cookbook
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The best microwave baked potato recipe

Using the microwave and the oven for baked potatoes speeds up cooking time without compromising texture!

The best microwave baked potato recipe Pinterest image 2

I haven’t met a potato I didn’t like from cheesy party potatoes to mashed potatoes to potato soup to to french fries to potato chili, I love them all. When it comes to baked potatoes, I like them soft and tender. But baking them for hours isn’t really my jam. I don’t have time for that! Instead I take a trick from my mom using this microwave baked potato recipe. Because you start the potatoes in the microwave and finish them in the oven, they cook faster and you still get that nice oven-baked texture.

These microwave baked potatoes are incredibly easy. They’re perfect for weeknight or weekend dinners!

Microwave the baked potato

Turn your oven on to 450-degrees (F) to start preheating.

Before you put your baked potatoes in the microwave, you need to poke holes in the potatoes or else they will explode. I usually stab mine all over in random places with a fork. I don’t know that I need to make as many holes as I do, but I figure better safe than sorry. After all, I don’t want to clean up an exploded potato mess!

Raw potatoes on a plate being pierced with a fork

Put the potatoes on a microwave-safe plate, and then place them in the microwave. I cook them in the microwave at 100% power for about three minutes per potato. You can probably get away with two minutes per potato if they are smaller potatoes, but I usually do this with large ones and serve them as our main dish.

So, I cooked these three potatoes in the microwave for 12 minutes.

Prepare for the oven

A couple of minutes before the potatoes are finished in the microwave, I get set up to transfer them to the oven with a baking sheet, sheets of aluminum foil, vegetable oil with a tablespoon and coarse sea salt.

Set up to move the baked potatoes from the microwave to the oven with a baking sheet, aluminum foil sheets, vegetable oil with a tablespoon and coarse sea salt

When the microwave stops, take the potatoes out. The potatoes will be hot, so use oven mitts to pick them up one at a time to transfer them to the foil sheets.

Using an oven mitt to pick up a hot potato from the microwave

Once the potato is on a foil sheet, drizzle one tablespoon of vegetable oil over it.

A baked potato being drizzled with vegetable oil

Next, sprinkle the potato with the coarse sea salt, if desired.

A baked potato that has been drizzled with oil and sprinkled with coarse sea salt

Wrap the foil around the potatoes and place them onto a baking sheet. Cook them in the oven at 450-degrees (F) for 20 minutes.

Three potatoes wrapped in foil on a baking sheet and ready to go into the hot oven

Enjoy the potato

When the potatoes are finished cooking, take them out of the oven. Carefully open the foil to let them start to cool.

A hot potato fresh from the oven

Cut the potato open carefully and use a fork to mash the inside a bit, if you like it that way. (I sure do!)

A fully cooked baked potato with a soft center

Add your favorite toppings and you’re good to go! We usually have baked potatoes as our main dish, so I loaded this one up with butter, cheese, sour cream and bacon bits. On the night I took these photos, we had a total carb fest. I also served up this delicious homemade french bread! Another great pairing for these baked potatoes is my mom’s meatloaf with ketchup glaze.

A finished baked potato loaded with butter, cheese, sour cream and bacon bits

Microwave baked potato

This is the best microwave baked potato recipe because it starts in the microwave to cook faster but ends in the oven for a better texture.
Prep Time 10 minutes
Cook Time 52 minutes
Total Time 1 hour 2 minutes
Course Side Dish
Cuisine American
Servings 3 people

Ingredients
  

  • 3 large russet potatoes
  • 3 tablespoons vegetable oil
  • 1 teaspoon coarse sea salt optional
  • baked potato toppings as desired like butter, sour cream, cheese, bacon bits, etc.

Instructions
 

  • Preheat the oven to 450-degrees (F).
  • Scrub your potatoes until they're clean. Pierce each potato in numerous places with a fork to make holes.
  • Put the potatoes on a microwave-safe plate and cook in the microwave for 3 minutes per large potato. (For three large potatoes, cook for 12 minutes.)
  • Just before the potatoes finish in the microwave, get out sheets of aluminum foil to hold the potatoes along with a baking sheet, the vegetable oil and the salt, if desired.
  • Carefully transfer one potato at a time to a sheet of aluminum foil. (I use oven mitts for this because the potatoes are hot!)
  • Drizzle the potatoes with 1 tablespoon each of the vegetable oil. Sprinkle with the salt, if desired.
  • Wrap the potatoes in the foil, place them on a baking sheet and cook in your preheated oven for 20 minutes.
  • Carefully peel back the foil from the baked potatoes, cut them and serve them with your favorite baked potato toppings.
Keyword baked potato, family dinner, family friendly, microwave cooking, potato, weeknight dinner

Meatloaf recipe with ketchup glaze

My all-time favorite meatloaf recipe

There are so many different ways to make meatloaf. I’ve seen it with brown gravy over the top. Sometimes it’s dry. Other times it’s spicy. But, my all-time favorite meatloaf recipe topped with ketchup glaze comes from my mama. It’s one of my favorite dishes she makes.

Meatloaf recipe Pinterest image 3

I hadn’t made meatloaf myself until more recently. My husband and son won’t eat it. They don’t eat much meat. But after trying various meal kit delivery services, I learned making two different dinner options was sometimes worth it. I tried out some meatloaf recipes, and they were good enough. However, they weren’t my mom’s.

For just over a year, my parents have lived states away from me instead of five minutes away from me. So when they were here for a visit in the fall, I asked my mom to make meatloaf. She not only made it, but also froze some meatloaf patties that my daughter and I enjoyed later on for dinners. When my parents were back for my son’s recent birthday, I knew I had to write down her recipe, take photos and share it with you guys as well!

This meatloaf recipe is home-cooking at its finest. It’s not fancy, but it’s hearty and delicious. Serve it up with mashed potatoes or cheesy party potatoes and oven-roasted vegetables for a complete meal.

Figure out the meat

So the issue here is what kind of meat to use. You can use all ground beef (we use chuck at 80/20 fat) or a mix of ground beef and ground pork or sausage. It’s good all the ways! This particular time, we made it with the mix of ground beef and ground pork, because I had some leftover ground pork I wanted to use.

If you do use a mixture of meat, you want to use 3/4 ground beef and about 1/4 ground pork or sausage. We used 2.5 pounds of meat total for five adults (with leftovers), which broke down to 2 pounds of ground beef and 1/2 pound of ground pork.

The fresher your meat is, the better the meatloaf will be. If you have a butcher or butcher’s case at your grocery store, go with ground meat from there. You don’t need it to be all-organic and grass-fed (unless that’s your thing). You just want fresh. However, this time around, we used frozen meat I had, and it was still incredibly good.

Mix up your meatloaf

Switch your oven on to 350-degrees (F) to get it preheating, and then start mixing your meatloaf. Put all of the meat into a large mixing bowl. Add 1 egg, 1 teaspoon of sage (unless you use sausage, in which case omit this), salt, pepper, 1/2 cup diced onion, 3 tablespoons of ketchup and 3 tablespoons of honey barbeque sauce.

The meatloaf ingredients (minus the glaze ingredients) in a large mixing bowl ready to be combined

Cut up about three slices of bread into small pieces. You an use whatever bread you have. This time, I had leftover french bread from serving slow cooker potato soup for dinner a couple of nights prior, so I used that. But regular sandwich bread works. In a pinch, crumbled crackers can work as well.

Chopped bread crumbs ready to go into the meatloaf recipe

Add the bread pieces into the meat mixture and mix it all together well. You can use a spoon for this or your clean hands to do so. I think using your hands is easiest, but do what works for you.

The meatloaf ingredients all mixed together and ready to go into the pan

The next step in this meatloaf recipe is putting the meat into a 9×13 baking dish. My mom’s tip is to make a bit of a “well” around the meat in between the meat and the pan. The grease will collect there and be easier to drain off.

The meatloaf in the pan, with a small amount of space between the meat and pan, that's ready to go into the oven

After your meatloaf is in the pan, top it with the 6 ounces of tomato paste. Cover the pan with aluminum foil and place the meatloaf in your preheated oven for 45 minutes.

Finish the meatloaf

About five minutes before the 45-minute mark, mix up your glaze. The ketchup glaze in this meatloaf recipe is probably my favorite thing about it! Mix together 2 tablespoons of brown sugar, 2 tablespoons of ketchup and 2 tablespoons of honey barbeque sauce.

Pull the meatloaf out of the oven. The tomato paste will have baked into the top a bit and grease will have gathered around the sides.

The meatloaf after having baked covered for 45 minutes with the grease around the edges

If you want, an optional step for this meatloaf recipe is to drain off some of the grease. That’s what we chose to do. Here is what it looked like after we drained the grease.

The meatloaf after draining some of the grease out of it

Next, it’s time to spread the ketchup glaze over the meatloaf. Spread the mixed up glaze right on top of the tomato paste.

The meatloaf recipe topped with the ketchup glaze and ready to finish baking in the oven

Put the meatloaf back into the oven, uncovered, for 15 more minutes. Let it set for about five minutes and then slice and put onto a plate for serving. (You want to move it to a plate to serve from because baking the second time will create more grease that you don’t want the meat sitting in.)

Serve up with some cheesy party potatoes, oven-roasted vegetables or mashed potatoes and enjoy!

A slice of delicious meatloaf with ketchup glaze alongside some mashed potatoes
Meatloaf recipe Pinterest image 2

Meatloaf recipe with ketchup glaze

This meatloaf recipe with ketchup glaze is my mom's long-time recipe that makes the best meatloaf hands down. You've got to try it!
Prep Time 15 minutes
Cook Time 1 hour
Total Time 1 hour 15 minutes
Course Main Course
Cuisine American
Servings 6 people

Ingredients
  

  • 2 pounds ground beef
  • 0.5 pounds ground pork
  • 8 ounces tomato sauce
  • 3 slices bread chopped
  • 1/4 teaspoon sage
  • 1 egg
  • 1/2 cup onion diced
  • 5 tablespoons ketchup divided
  • 5 tablespoons honey barbeque sauce divided
  • 6 ounces tomato paste
  • 2 tablespoons brown sugar

Instructions
 

  • Preheat the oven to 350-degrees (F).
  • Put the ground beef and ground pork into a large mixing bowl. Add in the tomato sauce, bread, sage, egg and onion.
  • Add 3 tablespoons of ketchup and 3 tablespoons of barbeque sauce, and mix the ingredients well.
  • Put the meat mixture into a 9×13 baking dish. Flatten it out to the same thickness throughout and leave a small space between the sides of the dish and the meat.
  • Spread the tomato paste over the top of the meat. Then cover with aluminum foil and baked for 45 minutes.
  • About 5 minutes before the meatloaf is finished with the first round of baking, mix together 2 tablespoons brown sugar, 2 tablespoons ketchup and 2 tablespoons barbeque sauce to form the ketchup glaze.
  • Remove the meatloaf from the oven. If desired, drain some of the grease from the meatloaf. Then spread the glaze over the top of the tomato sauce.
  • Put the meatloaf back into the oven, uncovered, for an additional 15 minutes.
  • Remove the meatloaf from the oven and let it set for five minutes before slicing and transferring to another plate to serve.
Keyword family dinner, family recipe, ketchup glaze, kid friendly, meatloaf, traditional recipe

How to start a new business as a new mom

Ideas for mompreneurs to get started while welcoming a baby

I’m excited to share this blog post about how to start a new business as a new parent. Charlotte Walker of HomeSafetyHub.com has some great insights for mompreneurs to get started in a business or side hustle. Charlotte herself has been passionate about safety her whole life and enjoys writing about topics related to homes and home life.

When you make the decision to start or grow your family, you have so many exciting milestones to look forward to. At the same time, though, it can be a period of overwhelming responsibilities. To meet your evolving financial goals, you might come to the decision to start a new business. While doing so can make this period of your life even more turbulent, it is a challenge worth undertaking for the sake of your family’s well-being. By keeping a few helpful tips in mind along the way, you can lay a strong foundation of support that will help keep your new child happy and healthy for years to come.

How to start a new business as a new mom Pinterest image 1

Start with a great business plan

You can reduce the stress you place on yourself during this hectic time by having an actionable business plan that removes some of the uncertainty from the situation. A well-written plan outlines the goal of your business, as well as the processes you will follow to attain that goal and the funding options available to you.

Your business plan should also describe the structure you will choose for your enterprise. For example, you might decide to establish a limited liability company or LLC to protect yourself from potential litigation issues and excessive tax obligations.

Develop Marketing Strategies

In outlining a successful marketing plan as you start a new business, consider both long and short term goals, analyze current market trends, set a budget and define a target audience. You’ll want to identify what platforms you will use to reach potential customers and develop an argument that creates conversions by emphasizing the value of your product or service.

Content marketing entails creating and sharing meaningful content that resonates with the target audience of that business. With a well-thought-out strategy, an effective content marketing program can generate more leads and establish trust with potential customers while helping a new business develop its brand image. Content creation is essential when you start a new business.

Prioritize Work-Life Balance

Mental health experts claim that as many as one in four Americans feel the stresses of a poor work-life balance. The ability to strike this balance should be a given, not a luxury. As a parent welcoming a new baby, finding that work-life balance is a necessity for ensuring your family gets the attention they need.

The best way to find a healthy balance is by building out a schedule or routine that accounts for all of your responsibilities while also being sustainable for your own wellness. As another idea, consider setting up a space for your new baby close to your home office so you can respond quickly when parental action is required.

Invest in Comfortable Clothing

New moms need comfortable clothing that can easily transition from a busy day of running their new business, to feeding a baby and then to some much-needed rest and relaxation. Finding clothing that is both stylish and supportive isn’t always easy, but with the right combination of items it is definitely possible! Look for relaxed fits like ultra-soft T-shirts, tunic tops, easy pants, and drapey yoga sets that provide plenty of air ventilation and don’t cling in any areas.

Save Time With Efficient Business Practices

Using the best tools and methods available will help you cut down on your daily workload, giving you more time to spend with your family. Premium accounting software and other examples of cutting-edge tech may seem like unnecessary investments at first, but the amount of time and money you can save in the long run can make these solutions absolutely necessary.

Another way to save yourself some precious time is by implementing a thorough document management system. This is especially important if you need to share files with clients, employees or collaborators. Keep in mind that PDFs are often the preferred file format. A PDF converter will allow you to streamline your filing and recordkeeping by converting files that are in different formats.

Find Help When You Need It

If you find yourself in a situation where you simply cannot give your young children the attention they deserve, it may be time to seek outside help. Hiring a reputable babysitter or childcare service can give you peace of mind in knowing your child is safe and cared for at all times.

There are few things as fulfilling as starting a business or becoming a parent. Experiencing both at the same time can be uniquely challenging but also unparalleled in creating a sense of accomplishment. Write a business and marketing plan, purchase some comfortable clothing, prioritize work-life balance, learn about efficient business practices and find childcare help to become a successful mompreneur.

Looking for more resources to start a new business as a mom? Join me this year at the Monetizing Mompreneurs Summit!

Monetizing Mompreneurs Summit information for 2023

Advice to my younger self

Words of wisdom for tweens and teens

When I think about whether I’d go back and tell my younger self anything if I could, sometimes I think I would. Other times, I think I wouldn’t.

After all, the life I’ve lived has formed me into who I am today. However, as my daughter is officially in the teen years, I have been thinking more of advice to my younger self.

Advice to my younger self Pinterest image 3

These nuggets of wisdom garnered over four decades of life have been hard-earned and oftentimes hard-learned. I want to pass along words of wisdom as much as I can to my children.

I know they won’t always listen. Some lessons they’ll have to learn the hard way. And they’ll learn lessons that weren’t even relevant to me as a teen, especially as it relates to social media. As a xennial, social media wasn’t on the scene for me in middle or high school.

I also realize that neither of my children are replicas of me. I see parts of myself in both of them, but they are fully and uniquely their own people.

So in thinking of advice to my younger self, I stayed away from specifics. Instead, I came up with 10 main points I wish all tweens and teens could embrace and take in.

Affiliate links are used in this post, if you make a qualifying purchase via my link, I receive a small percentage of the sale at no additional cost to you. It helps support my blog, so thank you for your support! Read my full disclosure here.

1. Don’t take everything so personally.

Honestly, at the root of not taking everything so personally is more this message: Not everything is about you.

Here’s what I mean. If you have a friend who isn’t as talkative one day, chances are he or she probably isn’t mad at your. Most likely your friend is tired or having an otherwise off day.

If your mom snaps at your for something small, she is most likely just juggling multiple things or having a rough day. It doesn’t mean you’re awful.

I’ve always been incredibly good at taking things personally. I see the same attribute in one of my children, especially.

But really and truly I’ve learned at least 90% of the time, the action or words I take so personally don’t really have anything to do with me specifically.

I wish I would have learned that sooner. I could have saved myself a lot of grief and anxiety.

2. Learn to speak up for yourself.

It took me into adulthood to find my voice. And even now, I still struggle to speak up for myself. Advocating for yourself is important.

If someone is treating you poorly, speak up for yourself and let them know it’s not OK before it’s too late.

In fact, I had a friend I was close with through middle school and most of high school. She would often say hurtful things that I let slide. And then one day, I’d had enough. I decided we were done.

Our friendship ended (for this and other reasons) when it might not have had I spoken up for myself and worked out the issues sooner.

Being a people pleaser never leads anywhere good. You can’t make everyone happy all the time.

Don’t be afraid to respectfully speak up for yourself and your needs.

And remember nobody can read your mind. If you have an issue with someone, talk to them plainly instead of passive aggressively.

3. Know you’ll find your people.

Some people make lifelong friends early on in life. My husband, for example, has a great friend who he met in fifth grade, and they have been friends ever since.

But not all of us are those kind of people. When it comes to friend “luck,” in fact, I’ve struck out more often than not. If I were to give advice to my younger self, I’d tell her to hang in there.

During the tween and teens years, you’re mostly just with the kids you know from school. Maybe you’ve found your people during these years — and that’s awesome.

But maybe you haven’t. Or maybe they are sort of your people but not quite. Know you will eventually find your people who “get” you and accept you for who you are.

As you get older and into college and work, you’ll meet more people. Some will be part of your life for a season; others will remain for a lifetime.

Don’t worry if you’ve not found your lifetime friends, yet. You still have plenty of time.

4. Stick with friends who stand by you.

Friendships are constantly shifting and changing when we’re in middle and high school. I have a plethora of stories just from my own middle and high school days! But, if you find a friend who sticks with you during hard times, keep them.

I will never forget the day in my senior year of high school when a group of “friends” spent the entire lunchtime talking negatively about me. One of my friends got up and left the table. She didn’t engage in the conversation and came to find me instead. She gave me support and encouragement.

To this day, she is still one of the only people from high school I see on a regular basis. When you identify your true friends, hang on tight.

5. Ignore other people’s opinions of you.

During middle and high school, I was very aware of other people’s opinions of me. I think that’s pretty normal. But sometimes we need to just ignore what other people think and live our lives.

Don’t be so busy worrying about what other people think of you that you let it shape the decisions you make. I know that can be easier said than done. I wish I would have learned sooner to not care about other’s opinions too much, though.

A great piece of advice I see floating around online is to not take criticism from people who you wouldn’t go to for advice.

6. Remember everyone has a story and a struggle.

To some degree, I think we all are aware everyone has more going on than we know about. Yet, we can easily forget that in the midst of dealing with our own challenges.

In giving advice to my younger self, I’d remind her she doesn’t know everyone’s story. Some people need more grace than anyone gives them. Some people need to be loved. Others need someone to call them on their actions.

Remember if you’re going through a difficult time, it doesn’t mean your friends aren’t. We can be very good at acting like everything is fine when it isn’t.

Sometimes the people who seem the happiest and most bubbly at school are the ones who cry themselves to sleep each night. Give grace, compassion and love to the people around you. Do they always deserve it? Nope. But, that’s what grace is – giving someone something they don’t deserve.

Give grace, compassion and love to the people around you. Do they always deserve it? Nope. But, that's what grace is – giving someone something they don't deserve.

7. Don’t be so stressed about academics.

Growing up, I put so much pressure on myself to do well in school. I have theories about why I did this, but they don’t matter.

What I’ve learned is nobody in my life as an adult cares what my high school GPA was. Did having a great GPA help me land a full scholarship to college? Absolutely. But, did I need to stress as much as I did over it? Definitely not.

My advice to my younger self would be to just let it go sometimes. To do well, do her best and get good grades, but don’t make that such an important part of life.

I completely missed my 16th birthday because I had a band concert that night. My band director threatened to dock my grade to a “C” if I didn’t go to the concert.

So instead of celebrating with my family as planned (and as I wanted to), I went to the concert. I didn’t want to risk my GPA. Looking back, I should have just stayed home and celebrated. And that leads to…

8. Relax and enjoy life.

I know life seems stressful and busy when you’re a tween and teen. I do remember that, but I can also promise you are in a phase when you can choose to just enjoy life.

You have some responsibilities, sure. However, you aren’t in charge of everything in your life. While that is sometimes frustrating, it’s also freeing.

Middle and high school are the perfect times to enjoy life. Try new things. Take up a new hobby and see what you think. Spend a Saturday reading through an entire novel.

Don’t get so caught up in the stress of life that you forget to also enjoy it!

9. Life will never go according to plan.

Poor younger me. She was a planner. In fact, I still am a planner. I love to have a plan and to-do lists. They make my heart sing.

But my best advice to my younger self is to know that life won’t go according to plan, and that’s OK. Your tween and teen years are a great time to learn to embrace the unpredictability of life. Get upset about the change in what you had planned if you need to.

However, don’t get stuck there. Move forward into a plan B, C, D or however many letters it takes!

One day, you’ll look back and understand why your original plan not working out was for the best. Or at the very least, you’ll see lessons you learned as a result.

And more times than you would guess, you’ll be thankful your original plan fell through because the alternative was so much better. Make plans, but know they won’t always turn out exactly as you envisioned, and it really is OK.

10. Give yourself grace.

Yep. I do harp on this a lot, but it’s something I wish my younger self knew sooner. I’ve spent a lifetime excelling at being hard on myself. I’m nice to people around me. In fact, I love encouraging other people and always have, even as a tween and teen.

But, whew! I am mean to myself. My inner voice says awful things and has no patience for mistakes.

I’m continually learning to quiet this voice and remind myself I’m doing the best I can. I truly wish I had learned this lesson from a younger age. It would have saved me from so many negative feelings and given me self-confidence.

See the video of this post here and on the Families with Grace YouTube channel:

Edible chocolate chip cookie dough you can make in minutes!

A delicious cookie dough dessert without any raw eggs

I love chocolate. A lot. A super lot. My favorite cookies are chocolate chip cookies. And I definitely enjoy some chocolate chip cookie dough when I’m baking them.

But, I don’t eat it otherwise, because the risk of salmonella. My son loves chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream. So when I discovered an easy recipe for edible chocolate chip cookie dough, I knew I had to try it.

Edible chocolate chip cookie dough Pinterest image

I first made it in 2020 when we were spending lots of time at home thanks to COVID-19. Since then, I’ve made this edible chocolate chip cookie dough multiple times and learned a few things along the way.

The first being that I need to double the recipe. Making just the amount for the original recipe isn’t nearly enough for my family!

I’ve made a couple of other tweaks to the recipe and it’s the absolute best. I just made a couple of batches for my son’s 10th birthday and knew I had to share the recipe for this edible chocolate chip cookie dough. I can’t keep the deliciousness to myself!

Prepare the flour

My concern in eating raw chocolate chip cookie dough used to be just the salmonella in the eggs. However, I’ve more recently learned raw flour also poses a risk.

Processing grains into flour doesn’t kill the bacteria in the flour. So this recipe starts with cooking the flour to get rid of the bacteria.

The good news is that you can do this easily in your microwave. Pour two cups of all-purpose flour into a microwave-safe bowl and microwave in 30-second increments, stirring after each 30 seconds, until the flour reaches 165-degrees (F). My microwave usually does this in two run-throughs.

A bowl of flour to heat-treat for the edible chocolate chip cookie dough recipe

I grab my kitchen thermometer and really do measure the temperature for this process to be sure. If you don’t have a kitchen thermometer, then just heat the flour for at least 1 minute in 30-second increments.

Mixing the cookie dough

Once your flour is all prepped and ready to go, you just need to mix together all the ingredients. I use my beloved stand mixer, Dorothy, for making this edible chocolate chip cookie dough, but you can also use a hand mixer or spoon.

Put your prepared flour to the side and beat the 2 sticks of room temperature butter with 2 cups of packed brown sugar.

The butter and brown sugar in a mixing bowl ready to cream together for this edible chocolate chip cookie dough recipe

You’ll know it’s creamed when it is thoroughly combined and fluffy.

The creamed butter and brown sugar in the mixing bowl

Next, add in 1/4 cup milk, 2 teaspoons vanilla extract and 1 teaspoon of salt. Mix the ingredients together. (Be sure to slow down your mixer before adding in the wet ingredients to avoid getting splashed by them. Yes, I speak from experience!)

The mixture should be thick, but still wet and clumpy.

The mixture with the milk, vanilla and salt added into it

Now you’re ready to put treated flour to work. Mix it into the mixture in stages. I usually put it in with a heaping tablespoon at a time.

The mixing bowl with a tablespoon of flour ready to pour into the mixer and begin combining it for this edible chocolate chip cookie dough recipe

Once the flour is all mixed in, you should have the consistency of chocolate chip cookie dough that is thick and soft.

The thick, but soft "dough" that forms for this edible chocolate chip cookie dough recipe

Finally, it’s time to stir in the chocolate chips. You could use full-sized semi-sweet chocolate chips for this recipe, but the mini ones work better and are easier to eat.

I use my stand mixer’s “stir” setting to stir in the chocolate chips, but you could also do it by hand. You want to avoid a higher setting that will break up the chips.

The finished edible chocolate chip cookie dough in the stand mixer

Transfer the edible chocolate chip cookie dough into an airtight container and store it in the refrigerator. I can’t tell you how many days it lasts in the fridge beyond two or three, because my family doesn’t keep it around for long!

The edible chocolate chip cookie dough in an airtight container ready to go into the fridge

Serve it by itself, alongside fudgy brownies, with ice cream or however you think sounds best!

A "scoop" of edible chocolate chip cookie dough in a bowl with a spoon ready to be devoured!
Edible chocolate chip cookie dough Pinterest image

Edible Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough

This edible chocolate chip cookie dough recipe is delicious and easy. Eat it by the spoonful, with ice cream or with any other dessert!
Total Time 15 minutes
Course Dessert
Cuisine American

Ingredients
  

  • 2 sticks salted butter room temperature
  • 2 cups brown sugar packed
  • 1/4 cup milk
  • 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
  • 1 teaspoon salt
  • 2 cups flour heat treated (see instructions below)
  • 1 cup mini semi-sweet chocolate chips

Instructions
 

  • Heat treat the flour to kill any bacteria contained in it by placing it in a microwave-safe bowl and "cooking" it in the microwave for 30 seconds at a time, stirring between each 30 seconds, until the temperature throughout reaches 165-degrees (F). Set the flour aside.
  • In a stand mixer or using a handheld mixer, add the butter and brown sugar. Beat together until well combined and fluffy.
  • Turn the speed down and add in the milk, vanilla and salt. Mix until combined.
  • Slowly add in the heat-treated flour at low to medium speed until it is well mixed into a soft, thick "dough."
  • Stir in the chocolate chips.
  • Put the edible chocolate chip cookie dough into an airtight container and store in the refrigerator. Enjoy!
Keyword chocolate chip cookie dough, easy dessert, edible chocolate chip cookie dough, no bake dessert
Families With Grace
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