A real look at cleaning with kids at home

If you’d have told me a decade ago that I’d write about house cleaning tips, I’d have laughed in your face.

Back then, I had a 2-year-old and a 5-year-old, and I was struggling to keep up with the bare minimum.

These days, those babies are now in middle and high school. Through the years, I’ve learned a few things that work from my mom and from my own experiences.

(Find the link for the free 4-week deep cleaning challenge at the bottom of the post.)

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Why a clean house is more peaceful

When my house is a mess, I feel guilty. And when I feel guilty, I get grumpy.

And when I get grumpy, I’m more inclined to snap at my family for small things.

The other option is jumping into a pit of self-pity and sadness that I’m not better at cleaning my house.

I feel more pressure than my husband to keep our house clean and more embarrassment when it isn’t. I interpret our messy house as my own personal failure.

You’d think that would make me an excellent housekeeper. But it doesn’t.

Instead of doing something about it, many times I just beat myself up. I have had literally years at a time where I couldn’t do better for a variety of reasons and still berated myself over it.

However, I have learned some things through the years, and I’m going to share them with you in case you aren’t one of those rare folks who love to clean.

I don’t offer a detailed cleaning plan. I’ve tried those, and they stress me out and make me feel worse about all that I’m NOT doing. Instead, I’m offering real-life tips that have helped my family. 

Most of these are inspired by my mom who not only is an excellent housekeeper but truly enjoys cleaning. (I know. It’s weird to me, too!)

Employ the ABC method: Always Be Cleaning

One of my best tips is ABC: Always Be Cleaning. That might sound like a nightmare to you, because it certainly would have to the me of a couple years ago. But, hear me out.

My mom’s strategy is to clean as she goes so there isn’t a big mess to deal with later. It sounds simple, and it really is.

I do things like wipe down my kitchen sink after washing dishes (which takes an extra 60 seconds at most).

Deal with the mail immediately after bringing it in so it doesn’t end up on the countertop for days.

I wipe down the bathroom counter after I finish getting ready. Most of the time, I just use my wet washcloth from washing my face.

I pull up the covers on my bed as soon as I get up, so the bed is mostly made.

I’ve learned a lot of these tasks take a short amount of time. Seriously in 30 seconds, I can do a quick wipe of my bathroom countertop. I can unload the dishwasher in less than 5 minutes.

Keep cleaning supplies handy

If you’re going to always be cleaning, then you need cleaning supplies where you use them.

When we moved into a two-story house a few years ago, I knew myself and knew I’d either forget to bring cleaning supplies up or down the stairs or find it easy to procrastinate if they weren’t in easy reach.

So I buy enough for each location. Each bathroom has disinfecting wipes and toilet bowl cleaner. I do share glass cleaner between them.

The kitchen sink has disinfecting wipes and vinegar. I buy smaller bottles of vinegar, so I have separate vinegar bottles for upstairs.

I know this doesn’t sound ground-breaking to many people, perhaps. But it has made a difference for me.

For example, earlier this week I realized that I hadn’t yet cleaned the half bathroom downstairs and needed to. On my stop by there before going to pick up the kids from school, I cleaned the toilet in a minute. Later I wiped down the sink.

And those are the biggest areas that need weekly cleaning in there, so it worked well. If the supplies were even just around the corner in the pantry (a few steps away!), I know I wouldn’t have done that. And, quite honestly, I probably STILL wouldn’t have done it even now a couple of days later.

Cleaning isn’t all or nothing

Previously I’ve had the idea that if I can’t clean everything then I don’t even want to start.

However, I have been timing myself on doing tasks and realize that in a few minutes, I can accomplish a lot. And the things that need cleaned most don’t take all that long.

I can spend five minutes cleaning my bathroom and feel much better afterward. Yes, it still needs to be deep cleaned and floors mopped and such, but every little step counts.

Finding hours to devote to any one task is difficult. Being able to physically spend hours cleaning my house is basically impossible nowadays.

I’ve changed my mindset from doing it all or nothing to doing what I can when I can. Now I almost see it as a challenge to see how much I can get done in a set amount of time like 15 minutes.

And I’ve been shocked at how much I really CAN do quickly. (I also find more motivation to clean or straighten up if I have a time limit. I can endure cleaning for 5 to 30 minutes!)

Embrace the right cleaning products 

Sometimes it’s about working smarter and not harder. From my mom, I learned vinegar can power through hard water spots and build-up anywhere. It’s a cheap and easy solution to cleaning things!

In my years of having a smooth-top stove, I’ve learned the absolute best cleaner for getting cooked in spots off is a mixture of baking soda and water. The grit in the baking soda, helps gently remove things.

I make a bit of a paste of with it and get to work. It works better than stovetop cleaners.

Another favorite cleaning product of mine is Dawn Power Spray. It’s great for messy pans and also for pretreating laundry. I’ve had spots on clothes coming out of the dryer, Dawn Power Spray-ed them, and they came clean.

And for very specific messes, I’ve found solutions as well. If you need to get Silly Putty or slime out of fabric, rubbing alcohol will help it come out with minimal scrubbing effort needed.

If you have blood in fabric, dab some hydrogen peroxide (undiluted) onto the spot, let it fizz, then wash like usual and it will come clean. In fact, I keep a spray bottle of peroxide in my laundry room for this very reason.

Enlist help

Throughout my adult life, my physical health has taken a hit many times. And with chronic health conditions, sometimes it takes a beating and I can’t do things.

So I have learned to ask for help and be willing to accept it. My kids have their own bathroom. They’re required to clean it once a week. They divide the tasks.

I gave them a lesson on exactly what I want them to do and how to do it. They don’t always clean as well as I do, but I do check in on their progress and have had them redo things.

And it still is helping both me and them! One of these days they’ll have their own bathrooms to clean.

In different stages of my kids’ lives, they’ve been able to help in various ways. While we don’t assign specific chores most of the time, we do expect them to help when we ask. They both are good to do just that.

Kids can do things like wipe down the table, sweep the floor, take out the trash, empty the dishwasher, fold laundry (folding washcloths and pairing up socks are great starting places), put away their belongings and more.

I will say, one nice thing about kids getting older is they are able to take on more responsibilities. Just the other night, I had a few pans to wash after dinner.

My husband tasked the kids with doing that, so I could sit down — and it was really nice to do that!

Don’t procrastinate 

I’m not usually a procrastinator by nature, but I can be very good at overlooking things that need to be taken care of or put away. Very good!

I try to make sure that I’m putting things away when I’m finished with them. But in that mindset, I’m also trying to make sure that each item in our house has a home.

If I get derailed from putting something away immediately, then I make a conscious effort to take care of it next time I come across it.

Along with putting things away, I try not to procrastinate when it comes to dishes and laundry.

There are ALWAYS dishes and laundry. But, I’ve worked to simplify as much as I can.

Staying on top of the dishes

I have arranged my kitchen around my dishwasher. So the things I use most often are stored right above the dishwasher or within a couple of steps.

I can empty the dishwasher in five minutes or less and usually make myself do it the next time I am working in the kitchen (which is quite often with kids!) or ask one of my kiddos or husband to unload it.

I’ve also worked to be practical. My kids take their lunch to school everyday. I have enough lunch containers for two days worth of cold lunches for both kids.

That gives me two days to wash the containers in the dishwasher instead of by hand, which saves me time. If I throw in a day of hot lunch in their hot Thermos, then that helps even more.

I also have to add that I intentionally buy dishwasher safe items to make life easier and not have to wash as many things by hand.

Managing the laundry

And then there’s laundry. While I’m not as fast as my mom who folds and puts her away immediately, I definitely make an effort to deal with it in the same day.

My washer and dryer are on the second story in the middle of the bedrooms, so that really helps. We keep two laundry baskets for dirty things at all times in the laundry room: one for darks and one for whites.

I keep two additional baskets for my husband and me. One for clothes in our closet and another for towels and whites in our bathroom closet.

I can easily see when a basket is full and a load of laundry need to be thrown in. It helps keep me from getting as overwhelmed with load after load of laundry all at once.

Another bonus is that I have a set amount of laundry baskets and I have to make sure to keep laundry folded and put away so we can use the baskets as needed. (I do keep a spare one, though. I’m not THAT good!)

My handy husband also hung me a nice bar in the laundry room so I can hang up clothes straight from the dryer. If I hang up most of our pants and shirts, then I don’t have as much work to do with folding either.

As my kids have gotten older, they’ve been more involved in the whole process. My daughter now does her own laundry, which is sometimes a challenge to make sure her laundry is getting processed in and out of the washer and dryer.

They can switch out laundry, hang up clothes and fold laundry. Usually one evening a week, we’ll have a “laundry folding party” and spend about 15 or 20 minutes in my bedroom folding laundry together.

Give yourself grace 

This is my final tip. No matter what systems I have in place, no matter how much progress I’ve made, I’m not perfect and I’m not going to be.

Life is going to get in the way. My health will flare for a week. My kids will get sick. Things happen.

I have learned to not beat myself up if I get out of routine and don’t clean my bathroom this week. It doesn’t mean I’m never going to get back on track. I will, and I do.

Can I say that in the past I was just a total slob and wasn’t doing my best? No way. I really was doing my best.

There are some seasons of life where it’s easier to clean than others. Having babies and toddlers make cleaning a huge challenge.

Going through physical and/or mental struggles makes cleaning a huge challenge.

Doing the best you can? Then it’s enough. Don’t beat yourself up for not being perfect or having the perfect home!

Here’s the thing: I’m never going to transform into someone who loves cleaning. (At least I will be shocked if I do!)

I won’t ever keep as spotless of a house as my grandma or my mom. But, that’s OK.

I try to be realistic in my goals and work for what makes my family and me the happiest. We are all happier when we have clean dishes and clothes.

We are all happier when there aren’t piles of papers all over the table we have to clean off every time we want to eat a meal.

We are all happier to go into a bathroom that smells fresh and doesn’t have weeks of build-up.

However, my family life isn’t going to dissolve into chaos if I let clean dishes sit in the dishwasher for 24 hours or a load of towels stay in the dryer for a couple of days.

I do my best, but I also remember my priorities. I don’t want to be so busy taking care of my family and my home that I don’t remember to enjoy my family.

Take the 4-Week Deep Cleaning Challenge

Get a jumpstart on house cleaning with this free 4-Week Deep Cleaning Challenge from Families with Grace!

It’s divided into four weeks with seven tasks each week as well as space to write in your own items. There are also some tips and encouraging verses to keep you motivated!

Encouragement and practical wisdom for the modern Christian mom

A mother’s love is one of the most powerful forces in the world—deep, selfless and enduring. While motherhood is full of joy, it also comes with exhaustion, doubts and hard days.

Sometimes we can feel like the struggle of motherhood in today’s world is vastly different from our foremothers. Yet, there are numerous lessons to learn from mothers in the Bible.

God’s Word is packed with examples of mom who loved their children fiercely and who had to learn about patience, sacrifice and trust in God.

Let’s take a look at five different mothers in the Bible and what each of them can teach us today.

This post is part of a series on Biblical love. Find all the details and links to other posts here.

Hannah: A mother’s love through surrender

Hannah longed for a child, and in her deep pain, she turned to God in prayer. She vowed that if God gave her a son, she would dedicate him back to the Lord.

When God answered her prayer and she gave birth to Samuel, she kept her promise, bringing him to the temple to serve the Lord.

Hannah’s story reminds us that motherhood is an act of surrender. We don’t have control over everything—our children’s futures, choices or even their safety.

But just as Hannah entrusted Samuel to God, we can trust that God loves our children even more than we do. On days when worry grips our hearts, we can cling to these words from the Apostle Paul:

Surrendering our children to God doesn’t mean we stop being involved—it means we cover them in prayer, seek His wisdom in our parenting and trust His plan even when things don’t go how we expected.

Practical application

Pray continually and specifically – Just as Hannah poured out her heart to God about Samuel, we can lift our children up in prayer daily. Whether it’s praying for their friendships, decisions, faith or future, we can trust that God hears us.

Keep a prayer journal to track prayers and see how God moves over time. You can also start with pre-written powerful prayers for your children.

Trust God with their future – Hannah dedicated Samuel to the Lord, fully trusting God’s plan for his life. As moms, we often want to control our children’s paths, but true surrender means trusting that God’s plan is greater than ours.

When worry creeps in, remind yourself that God not only has a plan to give you hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11), but He has the same plans for your children as well.

Model faithful obedience – Hannah followed through on her promise to God, even when it was difficult. We can surrender our children by modeling an unwavering faith—showing them what it looks like to trust God in hard times, worship Him in all circumstances and make faith-filled decisions.

When they see us walk in obedience, they learn to do the same. Sometimes this can be as simple as praising God out loud in front of them or involving them in a volunteer project with us.

The Canaanite woman: A mother’s love that perseveres

The Canaanite woman in Matthew 15:21-28 showed unshakable persistence when pleading with Jesus to heal her demon-possessed daughter. Though Jesus initially seemed to turn her away, she did not give up. Her faith moved Him, and He healed her daughter.

Motherhood requires perseverance. Whether it’s advocating for our children at school, praying over their struggles or simply surviving sleepless nights with a newborn, we are called to keep going.

This woman’s story encourages us to pray boldly for our children and to never stop believing in God’s power to move in their lives.

Even when our prayers feel unanswered, we can cling to God’s promise that no good is wasted:

Sometimes, our greatest act of love is to keep showing up—through the tantrums, the teenage rebellion or the tough seasons of life.

Practical application

Pray boldly and persistently – The Canaanite woman refused to give up when seeking Jesus’ help for her daughter. As moms, we can follow her example by praying persistently for our children, even when we don’t see immediate answers.

Keep bringing their needs before God, trusting that He hears and will act in His perfect timing (Luke 18:1).

Advocate for your children – Just as this mother boldly sought healing for her daughter, we are called to stand up for our kids. Whether it’s ensuring they get the help they need in school, guiding them through challenges or teaching them to make wise choices, perseverance means never giving up on them, no matter how hard the journey gets.

Cling to faith in difficult seasons – The Canaanite woman didn’t let discouragement stop her. When parenting feels overwhelming, we can persevere by holding onto faith.

Trusting God through tantrums, teenage rebellion or struggles with faith itself requires endurance. But just like this mother, we can believe Jesus is still working, even when we don’t see it yet.

Mary: A mother’s love that trusts God’s plan

Mary, the mother of Jesus, had to trust God in ways most of us will never fully understand. From the moment the angel Gabriel told her she would bear the Son of God, Mary responded with faith.

She watched her son grow into His ministry, knowing He was destined for the cross. As Jesus suffered, Mary stood nearby, witnessing His pain but trusting in God’s greater plan.

As moms, we often want to shield our children from hardships. But sometimes we must stand by them and trust God is working, even when we don’t understand. These verses are great to cling to in times like these:

Whether we’re watching our children navigate friendship troubles, big decisions or struggles with faith, we can follow Mary’s example by trusting God’s plan for their lives.

Practical application

Say “yes” to God, even when it’s uncertain – When the angel told Mary she would give birth to Jesus, she responded with trust, even though she didn’t have all the details (Luke 1:38).

As moms, we won’t always understand what God is doing in our children’s lives, but we can choose to trust Him. We can follow Mary’s example of surrender by releasing our fears about our children’s future or stepping out in faith as He leads our family.

Walk beside your children through their hardships – Mary didn’t try to stop Jesus from fulfilling His calling, even when it led to suffering. Likewise, we must resist the urge to shield our kids from every difficulty.

Instead of fixing everything for them, we can pray for them, offer wisdom and remind them that God is always with them (Isaiah 41:10). Because the the truth is not everything is fixable, and our children must learn to deal with challenges.

Trust that God is writing their story – From the manger to the cross, Mary had to trust God had a greater plan for Jesus. In the same way, we don’t always see what God is doing in our children’s lives, but we can believe He is at work.

Even when their journey doesn’t look like what we expected, we can trust that His plan is better than ours (Proverbs 3:5-6).

Jochebed: A mother’s love that protects

Jochebed, the mother of Moses, faced an impossible decision. When Pharaoh ordered all Hebrew baby boys to be killed, she knew she couldn’t kill her child.

So, she hid her son for three months before placing him in a basket in the Nile River (Exodus 2:1-10). She trusted God with his life, and He provided—Moses was found by Pharaoh’s daughter and eventually led Israel out of Egypt.

Jochebed’s story reminds us that protecting our children sometimes means making hard choices. From setting firm boundaries to making sacrifices for their well-being to covering them in daily prayer, we are called to guide and protect them.

We may not always see immediate results, but like Jochebed, we can trust that God is at work.

Our children may not be facing threat of death from a king, but we still must protect them making tough choices. We do things like monitor their friendships, limit their screen time and say not to something “everyone else” is doing.

These things take courage and strength, but Proverbs 22:6 encourages us:

Practical application

Take wise action while trusting God – Jochebed didn’t just pray for Moses’ safety—she also took action by hiding him and then placing him in a basket in the Nile.

As moms, we can take practical steps to protect our children, such as setting boundaries with technology, choosing the right influences and teaching them about God’s truth. At the same time, we trust that God is in control beyond what we can do.

Let go and trust God’s plan – As painful as it must have been, Jochebed had to release Moses into God’s hands. We, too, will face moments when we must let go—it’s the very nature of parenthood to prepare them for life on their own.

Letting go isn’t easy, but we can rest in the promise that God loves them even more than we do (Isaiah 41:13).

Pray for God’s protection and guidance – Jochebed couldn’t follow Moses into Pharaoh’s palace, but God was with him every step of the way.

Likewise, we can’t always be with our children, but we can cover them in prayer, asking God to protect and guide them through all they face. Our prayers invite God to work in their lives (Philippians 4:6-7).

The widow of Zarephath: A mother’s love that trusts in God’s provision

In 1 Kings 17:8-16, a widow and her son were facing starvation when the prophet Elijah came to her. She had just enough flour and oil for one last meal, but Elijah asked her to make bread for him first.

She obeyed, and God miraculously provided—her flour and oil never ran out.

Motherhood often comes with seasons of scarcity, whether it’s finances, time, energy or patience. The widow’s story teaches us that when we put our trust in God, He provides.

When we feel like we have nothing left to give, He fills in the gaps. Throughout the Holy Bible, we can find promises of this very thing.

Practical application

Trust God even when resources are scarce – The widow was preparing what she thought would be her last meal when Elijah asked her to make him bread first. Instead of giving in to fear, she trusted God’s provision.

As moms, we often worry about whether we’re providing enough—food, opportunities, emotional support and on the list goes. But God promises to meet our needs, and when we trust Him, He provides in ways we never expected.

Obey God even when it doesn’t make sense – The widow’s obedience to Elijah’s request led to God multiplying her flour and oil so she never ran out.

Sometimes, God calls us to trust Him in ways that don’t make immediate sense. It may be choosing faith over fear, stepping out in obedience or making sacrifices for our family.

Even when we don’t see the whole picture, we can trust He is working for our good.

Rely on God’s strength in hard seasons – Later in her story, the widow’s son became sick and died, and she cried out in grief (1 Kings 17:17-18). But through Elijah’s prayers, God brought her son back to life (1 Kings 17:21-22).

When we walk through painful seasons with our children—illness, struggles with faith or other difficult circumstances—we can bring our heartache to God. He hears our prayers, and while His answers may not always look how we expect, He is always near (Psalm 34:18).

Encouragement for moms: Living out a mother’s love

Motherhood is a journey filled with love, joy and sacrifice. Like the mothers in the Bible before us, we will have moments of surrender, perseverance, trust and protection.

But through it all, we are never alone. God walks with us, giving us strength for each day.

On the days you feel overwhelmed, remember this verse that talks about the special place moms have in God’s heart:

God sees your love, your effort and your heart. Keep leaning on Him, knowing that the love you pour into your children is a reflection of His great love for you.

No matter what season of motherhood you are in—from cradling a newborn to guiding a teenager to praying for an adult child—you are seen, valued and loved. Your love as a mother is a beautiful reflection of God’s love, and He will sustain you every step of the way.

Related articles:

5 Characteristics of good mothering for Christian moms

How Christian moms can teach their children about God

8 Prayers for joy for moms based on the Bible

7 Prayers for overwhelmed moms

30 Encouraging Bible verses on stress for moms