fbpx

Families With Grace

Helping Christian moms create homes filled with grace, love & faith

Moms with Grace: Dr. Real N. Kunene

Christian encouragement for single moms

The “Moms with Grace” series takes a look at modern Christian moms and how they handle daily life with raising children. You’ll find monthly posts from married and single moms with older kids, younger kids and all those in between. Let real-life moms encourage and uplift you!

Affiliate links are used in this post. If you make a qualifying purchase via my link, I receive a small commission at no additional cost to you. This helps support my blog. Thank you for your support! Read my full disclosure here.

A couple of months ago, I first connected with Dr. Real N. Kunene in a social media group for Christian mompreneurs. I was honored to participate as a speaker in her recent summit on successful parenting. As we connected, I knew Dr. Kunene would be a perfect fit for the Moms with Grace series.

Dr. Kunene’s background

Dr. Kunene is a single mom (since 2016) of two kiddos who are 8 and 10. She’s also an international human rights policy analyst and a diplomacy and protocol specialist who consults on policies and procedures related to protocol, diplomacy and human rights compliance.

Moms with Grace with Dr. Real N. Kunene: Christian encouragement for single moms

This passionate leader holds a Ph.D. with a discipline in leadership and business. She is also a highly sought after, energetic, certified Les Brown international speaker. Dr. Kunene empowers motivated professionals and entrepreneurs with the tools they need to rise to greater heights as they start, grow and scale their business. Her vision is to motivate and empower audiences with a fresh perspective while inspiring them to pursue success and drive sustainable outcomes, in a seriously funny way.

Dr. Kunene is an award-winning, international bestselling author with 10 number one books on Amazon. Her bestselling book “Rise to Greater Heights” has inspired and empowered many to pursue their personal and professional passion to become go-getters.

As a trainer, diplomacy protocol officer and strategist, Dr. Kunene believes we are in full control of our choices. Her mission is to meet the needs and transform lives of her clients and her audience. This change-maker, trailblazer and revolutionary is pushing boundaries and creating a real change worldwide. Like a phoenix that never accepted defeat and rose from its own ashes, she wants to challenge you to unleash your greatness and rise to greater heights.

Dr. Kunene is inspired by Hebrews 11, Psalms 27 and Psalms 40 to stay motivated and continue pursuing her dreams. She took time out of her busy schedule to share profound words of wisdom for single moms, especially. But no matter your marital status or phase of parenthood, I know you’ll be blessed and encouraged to rise to greater heights!

How have you changed from the beginning of your mom journey until now?

Motherhood has been such an adventurous journey. I so wish I could still sleep in on weekends and wake up at 11a.m.! From the beginning of my mom journey until now I’ve learnt how to let go of things by establishing limits and boundaries between family and work.

We must create boundaries of protection between our work and family, which will give us space for other thoughts and ideas to emerge. Trying to be everything to everyone only ensures failure; but, cutting ties with the outside world occasionally allows us to recover from weekly stress. Boundaries hold the line to protect your work from the distraction of family. Taking time to unwind is critical to success and will help you feel more energized when you’re on the clock.

Cut out the things in your life that are stressing you out. Then also protect your family involvement from the obligations at work. With clear boundaries, we often find the weight lifted was heavier than we realized. We are also able to have clearer discernment in both our work and personal lives.

How do you find balance day to day?

Daily I remain open to redirect and assess my needs in order to find balance. Sometimes I have to let things go because taking on more work when I’m already stressed out has a negative effect. If we do not make the conscious decision to achieve balance, we will most likely fail along the way because we are not clear on what we expect ourselves to accomplish. We must make an effort to provide ourselves the opportunity for balance, so when we leave the office, we avoid thinking about upcoming projects.

With my struggle to attain the perfect balance between work and family, I’ve learnt that those who do maintain a successful balance often have flexible work schedules. The dilemma of balancing family and work has no easy solution. There is no one-size-fits-all approach. Employers must make it a priority to grant employees access to a wider variety of benefits, because balance is a very personal thing, and only you can decide the lifestyle that suits you best.

Work-life balance will mean different things to different people because, after all, every person and family must find specific solutions to their issues depending on their own preferences and needs. There is nothing wrong with working hard to gain some of the finer things in life, because we all have different life commitments that fit our individual needs and improve our health and well-being.

What are some challenges you’ve faced as a mother? How have you worked to overcome them?

After my divorce in 2016, I found myself inundated by financial demands and my added responsibility posed an even steeper challenge. The main struggle I had was juggling a lot and working long hours trying to find the time and the energy to do all that I needed to do. For me, I used to worry about money constantly, asking myself how anyone can start a business when broke.

The concept of hustling is not a new one. So all the single mothers who are holding down the fort and raising a family by themselves, can start and sustain multi-million dollar organizations given the opportunity.

Raising kids alone is exhausting, as I juggle work while trying to spend as much time with my kids as possible. Lack of support was a reality for me and seeking a balance between finding a babysitter or doing something myself has become an intrinsic part of my life.

The quest for the perfect work-life balance is what hindered me from starting my business. I was terrified. The first few weeks I became a single mom, I felt like I was pulled in a trillion different directions. Trying to do everything on my own left my spirit totally depleted and my nerves on edge. My children and I were having daily meltdowns, and I realized that being a single parent can make the most patient person lose their entire jar of marbles!

Becoming a single mom wasn’t an easy journey, but I had to learn to guide and shepherd my children’s hearts. I know we all make mistakes. I couldn’t survive without the supernatural peace and strength of Jesus. It’s important for me to every day entrust my children’s care to the Lord. And I know I can trust in God to keep His promises and encourage me when I am feeling low.

What business lessons have you learned as a single mom?

When people heard I was a single mom, they thought I could not be successful. These toxic influences are people who tell you that business is hard and you can’t build anything worthwhile. Toxic influences are those people who always remind you that you are a single mom. They assume because you’re a single parent, you must be struggling. I couldn’t change the fact that I was a single mom. However, I could get of all toxic influences out of my life — those people who thought the only thing I should do was take care of my kids without telling me how.

Moms with Grace: Dr. Real N. Kuene Christian encouragement for single moms Pinterest image 6

For this reason, I am on a quest to break the stereotype of a single parent and all the negative connotations associated with it, instead of spending time with toxic people who invade my confidence and bring me down.

I showcase to the world that I can be a single mom and still have it all by setting goals for my business and for my life. I was convinced that there are numerous single moms with great experiences, so I decided to wear the hustler hat and created work that is profitable but not visible. The truth is, yes, you can be a single parent and make millions whilst raising your little ones. One essential tool for success in business is confidence and people can smell a lack of it on you.

It wasn’t always easy, but I started strong and self funded by being a certified hustler, and I operated on a budget.

In what ways you have and do you share your faith with your children?

While raising children alone can be a struggle at times, I hold on to God’s Word, which gives me the strength I need to keep going. Being a single mom is not a handicap. Instead of fighting my circumstances, I had to learn to accept it. The Lord is a helper to give wisdom and insight on ministering to our children. He’s available all the time to hear our prayers and act on our behalf.

My children know that prayer is our weapon of warfare. We put God first in everything. They’ve learnt to give and expect nothing in return as we feed the homeless on a quarterly basis. The Lord had always met all of our needs. I learned to find joy through Christ in the midst of a difficult situation.

The Lord embraces the single mother with His incredible love. Through the Holy Spirit, I hear words of truth from the Bible to help me keep pushing ahead. My heavenly Father is lovingly keeping an eye on my children to accomplish great things for the kingdom of God. Thus, my strength in the present is the investment in my children that will reap a beautiful return in the future.  

What are some of your favorite parts of motherhood?

As a single mom entrepreneur, I encouraged myself not to be marginalized by society and looked down on. Very rarely do we see positive images of single parents who are self-sufficient, successful contributors to society. In fact, being a single mom comes with an inbuilt capacity for business success. Because being a single mother is not an easy task, you discover inner strengths and capabilities you never knew you had.

Life is all about learning. Being a single parent is twice the work, which makes you stronger than ever before. Don’t get me wrong, I know raising a child on your own can be difficult. However, don’t let the perception of this lifestyle count you out before you even count yourself in.

Overall, being a single parent comes with a wealth of skills that do well in entrepreneurship, and success means being the best parent your kids can have and living your dreams while at it. Through my determination and preservation, I took all my pains and the difficult times to learn and grow stronger. In my kids’ eyes, I turned into a superhero. Being a single parent is not a setback. You have to own your single parent status, find what you love and do it.

What advice do you have for a single mom who wants to start her own business?

Normally, being an entrepreneur is a daunting task, but many men and women are incredibly successful while still looking after their own children by themselves. They’ve learned that when you have an unusual goal, you need an unusual way of thinking. That way of thinking takes you outside your comfort zone, especially when you are broke.

Use the wisdom of other people to help you. Make note of all the things that frustrate you in your daily life, then research creative ways to address those inefficiencies.

Also, look for inspiration everywhere: business coaches, people in networking groups or whoever has knowledge you might need. All it takes is an idea to create a product that changes the world.  

How does grace play a role in your daily life? Do you have any tips or advice for how moms can show more grace to their families?

Life is not about always being spic and span and perfect. I appreciate myself and give myself credit for the way I am bringing up your children. I am happy and content in life. The imperfections of life give life character and show your children your love. They can see what efforts you are putting in for them. Take time to realize how amazing your children have turned out to be and give yourself a pat on the back.

Of course you will have your highs and lows. Just take a look at the way you have brought up your children and remember your children have you and you are more than enough.

Our words have so much power over how our children see themselves, so I lean into the Word and apply it to my everyday life to guide me. Without a doubt raising kids on your own requires an unbelievable amount of strength and courage. But, that single parents can function just as fine or even better than whole families is an accomplishment of itself.

“I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.”

Philippians 4:12-13

What are you most proud of as a mom?

I’m raising God fearing children.

How have you grown from your failures?

At the end of the day, failure should not be our undertaker. Instead failure is an opportunity to begin again, as long as you learn from it. Single mom, you must know what you want from life because you are solely responsible for your success and your failure. Remember that your dreams are valid and all you need to do is fight for them. Beware that the way you think about a fact may defeat you before you ever do anything about it. Focus instead the actions needed to be taken and fail fast so you learn what not to do.

And the sooner you realize that failure is a temporary detour, you’ll keep on trying and build the right attitude. Blaming others of not reaching your goals in life can paralyze you and make your dreams become impossible. Please handle failure with dignity because you will not succeed in life without first failing.

Connect with other Christian moms for support and encouragement in the private Facebook group, Moms with Grace!

Read more in the series:

Rachael Belle

Linda Mendible

Mandy Farmer

Moms with Grace: Rachael Belle

Tips for Christian moms with a good dose of encouragement

The “Moms with Grace” series takes a look at modern Christian moms and how they handle daily life with raising children. You’ll find monthly posts from moms with older kids, younger kids and all those in between. Let real-life moms encourage and uplift you!

Sometimes when you get introduced to someone, you realize you are on the same page right away. That’s how it was for me with Rachael Belle. Rachael publishes a quarterly magazine called “Healing Home” that focuses on Biblical homemaking. She also maintains a related blog and a second site, Healing Home Recipes, where she posts healthy recipes for families.

Along with her online ministry, Rachael is a wife of nine years to Danny and a mom to three boys: Wyatt (5), West (3) and Wylder (8 months). Needless to say, she’s one busy mama! She and her family live on 40 acres in Minnesota where they homestead with gardens, bees, pigs, chickens and turkeys.

Recently she took time out of her jam-packed schedule to answer a few questions for the Moms with Grace series.

Affiliate links are used in this post. If you make a qualifying purchase via my link, I receive a small commission at no additional cost to you. This helps support my blog. Thank you for your support! Read my full disclosure here.

Can you share a little bit about your marriage?

It’s hard to talk about our marriage without mentioning a turning point that happened for Dan in 2005. At the time Dan was living a very different life. In God’s true sovereignty, He issued Dan a wake-up call in the form of a tree. The only problem with this tree is that it met Dan’s head as he was going 60 MPH on a brand-new Harley Davidson motorcycle.

Dan was found dead on scene. He died again in the ambulance and again on the operating table.

But God is gracious, and he saved my future husband’s life.

Dan’s life changed that night. He woke up with virtually no memory and had to relearn how to walk, talk, write, eat and everything else. Although I was not there during this tumultuous time, I have heard many of the stories. And to this day I marvel at God’s goodness in saving Dan’s life.

I met Dan in 2013 at our church, and we were married the next year.

How have you changed from the beginning of your mom journey until now?

The change in me could be summarized in one word: sanctification.

By no means, do I claim that I have arrived at any ending point of development, but again God is gracious. Motherhood and marriage reveal the sin nature in us in ways that nothing else has for me.

After I had my second child, I found myself seething in anger over the smallest of things. I never would have considered myself an angry person, but those little sinful boys triggered my own sin battle with bitterness, angry and resentment.

The beauty of the gift of motherhood is that God does not leave us helpless as we stand there wondering where all this sin is stemming from. He gave us His Word, other sisters in Christ, community and the church.

The biggest change in me from the beginning of my mom journey until now is God’s grace in my life revealing sin in me and His work in me as I learn to lean into His will for my life.

What are some challenges you’ve faced as a mother? How have you worked to overcome them?

The biggest challenge I have faced in motherhood is learning how to be a wife and a mother.

When Dan suffered his brain injury in 2005 it left his brain with certain damages. The section of our brain that allows us to feel empathy was greatly impacted. Our children need our empathy. When they are crying on the floor in frustration, our empathy is in part what allows us to offer them grace when it is needed.

When I married Dan, I thought I fully understood his brain injury, but I didn’t. I didn’t understand how his brain injury would impact our parenting. In our marriage vows I said, “I love you for you were, who you are and who you will become.” To this day that is the only section of our marriage vows that I remember, and it’s because God has brought them to my mind time and time again. He knew I would need that vow consistently in my head as I learned the balance of being Danny’s wife and my boy’s mother.

Your marriage is a covenant between you, your spouse and God. Your motherhood is a gift.

Out of the deepest of respect for my husband, I will be vague concerning this, but I have shed many tears of frustration and cried out to God in desperation as I have tried to learn the balance of parenting my children with grace when my husband’s brain significantly struggles to connect with empathy.

Yet at the end of the day, God is sovereign. He knew we would face this struggle before the beginning of time. I truly believe that if Danny is pursuing Jesus, I am pursuing Jesus and we are united in our love for our boys, we can conquer anything. If you are struggling in your marriage and parenting, do a deep dive into God’s sovereignty. I believe you will be blessed by the study.

In what ways have you and do you share your faith with your children? (I’d love examples!)

This past year we have started something that has been our number one discipleship tool! We make breakfast together and sit down as a family to enjoy a hearty breakfast and have family devotional time.

My husband can be home on Friday, Saturdays and Sundays, so on those days we sit down as a family of five. Most days we cook farm fresh eggs, bacon and some sort of sourdough bread or roll.

We eat and do a Bible reading or devotional. Our three favorites right now are: The Laugh & Grow Bible for Kids by Phil Vischer, How Great is our God by Louie Giglio and The Really Radical Book for Kids by Champ Thornton.

Sharing our faith comes in seasons, but in all the seasons we should be intentional. I have also used our drive time to listen to kids’ Christian podcasts and have discussions afterward. Our bookshelves are filled to the brim with books by Godly authors like R.C Sproul. His book The Priest with Dirty Clothes recently sparked some truly delightful conversations about our faith! Our faith is woven throughout our day and conversations. We are intentional about showing our kids that our affections should be for Jesus.

What are some of your favorite parts of motherhood?

I have endless favorite parts of motherhood, but truthfully my absolutely favorite part is simply watching them have fun.

Last night we were able to sit on our deck finally after such a long winter. My oldest son was in our field with a toy sword, and he was chopping down the tall grass and pretending to fight a dragon. My youngest was playing by a water table on our deck, and he looked over at me with such a big smile it melted my heart. Finally, I looked over at our middle while who was oblivious to the world. His hind end was sticking up in the air as he was trying to look inside a gopher hole.

It was absolutely perfect. Those are my favorite moments. It’s the moments I just get to enjoy watching them.

How does grace play a role in your daily life? Do you have any tips or advice for how moms can show more grace to their families?

I’m not perfect. Far from it. However, one of my prayers with my mothering is that in the moments where my weakness shows through that God’s strength would be evident.

Grace is a necessity in parenting. I need God’s grace to sustain me throughout the day, and my children need to see grace in my parenting. Grace is not the absence of discipline, but the evidence of it.

I often tell my children when I’m extending grace. It might sound something like this:

Wyatt, mommy messed up today and God extended me grace and forgave me. Right now, you directly disobeyed me, but I want to give you grace like Jesus did for me. Can we both repent and move on with our day?

What are you most proud of as a mom?

Right now, I’m just proud that my children seem receptive to what we have taught them about the Bible and Jesus.

Do you have any resources that help you be a mom with grace? (Music, books, websites, etc.)

I love podcasts and right now one of my favorites is The Art of Home: A Podcast for Homemakers by Allison L Weeks. She has great wisdom as a seasoned homemaker and mother.

Speaking of homemaking, I would love for you to join me in the most important step of my day, Bible reading! Inside my Homemaker Binder Planner (updated monthly) there is a Bible reading section. It has been a JOY to read my Bible with other mothers and homemakers. (P.S. You can still call yourself a homemaker even if you work another job!)

It would be a delight if you decided to join the monthly homemaker planner and joined me in the Bible reading challenge. During the month of May we have worked on reading a Proverb a day.

Do you have anything else to add that we haven’t talked about?

Your home can be a healing place! Allow Jesus to be the builder of your home and abide in him.

Connect with other Christian moms for support and encouragement in the private Facebook group, Moms with Grace!

Read more in the series:

Linda Mendible

Mandy Farmer

Moms with Grace: Linda Mendible

Tips for Christian moms with a good dose of encouragement

The “Moms with Grace” series takes a look at modern Christian moms and how they handle daily life with raising children. You’ll find monthly posts from moms with older kids, younger kids and all those in between. Let real-life moms encourage and uplift you!

I’m excited to bring you another mom with grace. Recently, I connected with Linda Mendible when I was chosen to be a speaker at her Monetizing Mompreneurs Summit taking place throughout 2023. Linda is a web designer and podcaster with a passion for mompreneurs. She also works with momprenuers to grow both their businesses and their communities.

Linda is also a mom to three kids who are 4, 6 and 9. This year, she and her husband, Franklin, will happily celebrate their 13th wedding anniversary. With three young children, a husband and a successful business, Linda is in the thick of parenthood, marriage and life in general!

Linda has great advice and encouragement for Christian moms.

How have you changed from the beginning of your mom journey until now?

I’m learning so much from being a mom. My kids definitely make me a better person. I’ve learned that we must always keep God first.

What are some challenges you’ve faced as a mother? How have you worked to overcome them?

Andy has been one of my kids that God has definitely tested me with. Aside from a very difficult birth, he was born with the umbilical cord wrapped around his neck and they had to call in other nurses to get him to breath. He was also born with a hole in his heart, which by God’s grace, is now completely healed.

When he was just a few months old, he had RSV and was admitted to NICU. At times he gets so sick that it makes it difficult for him to breath. During those times, I see him struggling and have to go through the process of helping him breathe and get some rest. Those days are tough. I do everything I can in those moments but they are the toughest moments when my little ones are sick. I’ve learned to say to myself, “I’ve been here before.”

I cast my cares on Jesus. My children aren’t mine, they are God’s children. I pray God gives me the strength to take care of them, love them and raise them in the way they should go, keeping God first and knowing the truth in Christ.

One of my go-to verses is Psalm 27:25 which says, “I was young and now I am old, yet I have never seen the righteous forsaken or their children begging bread.” (NIV)

Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)

Jeremiah 29:11 reminds me of God’s promises to us. And I remember God’s Word and what He said to Abraham. God told Abraham that his faith was accounted to him as righteousness. My faith is God and in Christ and I know I’m covered by His blood. I remind myself nothing is by my strength, and God does not see my flaws — just as when God told His people to take the lamb’s blood and put it over their door post. God didn’t see the people He saw the blood. It is by Christ’s sacrifice on the cross that allows me to have life and live it more abundantly. God’s Word is the living Word.

In what ways have you and do you share your faith with your children?

My kids know the Lord’s prayer, and we pray at night with them when things are not to hectic. At first I was the one praying the Lord’s prayer and they would repeat what I would say; now they lead the prayers with it. It’s been amazing to see. Sometimes life can give us surprises. They know Jesus loves them, and when things don’t go their way I ask them to pray to God about it. I tell them to ask God for what they want and thank God for all that they have. It really calms them down.

What are some of your favorite parts of motherhood?

That’s a tough question. All moments are my favorite, especially the times we create core memories from. One of my favorite times are when we go to the beach. I just love seeing them play and enjoy themselves; we collect seashells. We have a whole glass vase full of the shells we collected over the years. I can’t wait for summer again.

But then, I also love it when they help me with the garden. We have a small garden we started in our small apartment, and now that we have a house and a bigger yard it’s so much fun. They love it. Then there’s the everyday small moments that make me laugh. Or I see their little hands and hear their little voices, and I’m so thankful for them.

God is so gracious and good to us. Thank you, Lord, for all that you have done for us!

How does grace play a role in your daily life?

It’s a necessity. More of Him, less of me. I’m not perfect — far from it — and I need Jesus daily just for me to get up in the morning and pour a cup of coffee. So you can imagine how I need Him in all areas of my life! I just cast my cares to Him and pray daily, because I need Him all the time. But I’m so thankful I can just cast it all on Him. I do my best, God does the rest.

Do you have any tips or advice for how moms can show more grace to their families?

Motherhood is one of the most fulfilling things you can ever do in your life, and it’s one of the toughest and hardest things. From mom guilt to moments you just need the pause button. From play dates to baseball, classes and karate. To teacher conferences, bullies and amazing times. Find peace in the everyday. What do I mean? Try to sit still and just be thankful for the moment. Whenever life gets too hectic, I know it’s the most important times for me to sit still, slow down and listen. To be grateful.

Have you ever had your kids running around and you just know someone is going to end up crying? So you tell them to slow down, calm down or stop? And when they don’t listen, what happens? Someone ends up crying. Imagine if that’s what God does with us. So, if you’re ever feeling the rush, slow down, calm down and sit at His feet. He’s waiting for you.

What are you most proud of as a mom?

Oh gosh, what a question! I think I’m most proud of is my kids knowing Jesus.

Do you have any resources that help you be a mom with grace?

As a mompreneur I like listening to Terri Savelle Foy. As a mom who needs more grace I like listening to Joyce Myers. And as a family woman I like listening to Jentezen Franklin from Free Chapel. Resources will always be God’s Word. There’s nothing better in life than reading God’s Word daily. Remembering His promises and casting our cares to Jesus. I’m very blessed to know just how real God and Jesus is.

I also have a free 30 Days of Grace Challenge moms can take to help them grow in grace. It’s a Bible study, devotional and visibility challenge all rolled into one.

Do you have anything else to add that we haven’t talked about?

Live your life with the knowledge and reality that God is truly real and Jesus truly saves. God bless!

Connect with other Christian moms for support and encouragement in the private Facebook group, Moms with Grace!

Looking for more resources to start a new business as a mom? Join me this year at the Monetizing Mompreneurs Summit!

Monetizing Mompreneurs Summit information for 2023

Read more in the series:

Mandy Farmer, a blogger, children’s book author, pastor’s wife, mom and grandma shares encouragement for Christian moms, including those with blended families.

Moms with Grace: Mandy Farmer

Tips for Christian moms with a good dose of encouragement

Affiliate links are used in this post, if you make a qualifying purchase via my link, I receive a small percentage of the sale at no additional cost to you. I only recommend products and services I use and love. It helps support my blog, so thank you for your support! Read my full disclosure here.

The “Moms with Grace” series takes a look at modern Christian moms and how they handle daily life with raising children. You’ll find monthly posts from moms with older kids, younger kids and all those in between. Let real-life moms encourage and uplift you!

Today is the kick-off for the “Moms with Grace” series. Mandy Farmer is the featured Mom with Grace this month. Mandy has a blog, “Mandy and Michele,” for which I have shared guests posts a few times. I am thrilled to share her story with you.

Mandy is a 62-year-old mom to four children ranging from 26 to 48. The oldest two belong to her husband from a previous marriage, but Mandy has raised them completely since they were 9 and 14 and lost both their mom and sister in a car accident.

Her experiences as a mom and stepmom (though she says they never use the term “step”) are uplifting to those of us still in the thick of everyday life with kids. Mandy has survived the young years and is now reaping the benefits in her relationship with her children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren!

Please share a little bit about your background. Are you married? If so, for how long? What is your occupation? 

I was born near Canton, Ohio, and raised on the family dairy farm. At the age of 13, we moved, cows and all, to Wisconsin where I graduated from a small high school. I acquired a B.A. in computer science at Asbury University outside of Lexington, KY and went to work in Columbia South Carolina for about five years.  

At that point, my pastor’s wife introduced me to Michael Farmer, a pastor in her hometown of Barnesville, Ga. Michael had recently lost his wife and daughter in a fatal car accident. He had two boys, 9 and 14 at the time. She had been after me for months to go to Georgia with her and meet Michael. I didn’t think I was interested in a pastor with two boys but I finally went…just to get her to quit bothering me about it. 

Four months later, we were married! Now 32 years married!  

Fun note: I said I didn’t want to be a farmer’s wife or a pastor’s wife…I married Pastor Farmer! 

We added another boy and girl to the mix and continue pastoring around Georgia and for six years in Milwaukee, Wis. – my home state. 

I never worked outside the home or church after marriage and my degree quickly became obsolete, but my education was well worth it. 

I jumped full-time into my love of children’s ministry. Homeschooled our two youngest and founded a homeschool co-op. In between that, sometimes I served as Michael’s secretary. 

In 2011, I was struck with chronic pain. This changed a lot. Our daughter was 15. She became chief cook and bottle washer, making most meals, doing the laundry, keeping the house. She also, became my chauffeur! In 2016, we retired and moved to Savannah, Ga., and I began writing.

At first, I wrote about chronic pain and then I moved into writing Bible Studies for our denomination and an online group called Gracefully Truthful. Last year I decided to try to publish a book of devotions. That is still in the works, but in the learning process I wrote a children’s picture book about milk cows: Holly the Holstein Talks About Milk Cows.  I will publish another picture book about a family whose mommy has Fibromyalgia. You can follow me at my writing website to keep abreast of my publishing. 

How have you changed from the beginning of your mom journey until now? 

Another piece of my backstory is that I was number three of six children growing up. My youngest brother was 12 years behind me. My mom had a bookstore, so I did a lot of caring for him. This gave me a great deal of knowledge about childcare. I loved being a mom, and I can hardly wait to have grandchildren. (Our oldest has children and grands, but they have always lived far away.) 

Our children are all grown now. We live in the same city. Two kids are married. They all pop in all the time to check on us. Our oldest has two grown sons and a daughter. And we have six great-grandchildren! 

What are some challenges you’ve faced as a mother? How have you worked to overcome them? 

My initiation into motherhood started right off with a preteen and teenager. One got the chicken pox while Michael and I were on our honeymoon, and the other got them when we arrived home!  

My husband and I sat down with them before we married and talked about things. They wanted me to adopt them but because of moving several times it never happened. Michael told them that I would end up being their mother longer than their biological mother. And we decided they would call me “Mom.”  

Michael said he would always back me up when it came to discipline, and they were not to try to play us against one another. What I said would be “law” and if I dealt out a punishment, only I could change it. We had some of the typical teenager-mom issues. But really not many big issues that all moms don’t have.  

I love them like my own, and they love me the same. As a matter of fact, one of them sends me flowers every year on the anniversary of their mother’s death. The card always reads, “Thanks for being my mom.”

In what ways have you and do you share your faith with your children?

It’s a lifestyle. Everything seems to have something to do with faith in our lives. We have had many discussions around the dinner table. (Dinner table: what an important routine for the family!) 

Being a pastoral family, our kids were saturated in our faith. I wanted to have a family devotion time, but my husband felt that they got so much from being at the church A LOT that he didn’t want to do it. I did get them to have Advent devotions with me most years. We also homeschooled our children, and they received Bible training through that. Our church had children’s and teen’s Bible quizzing, and we were deeply involved in quizzing. 

Once they were old enough, they were involved in any special programs we had at church. They enjoyed every minute…well, maybe not every minute. 😊 

Pray for and with your children. After the car accident, going to school was very traumatic for Brian. He was dropped to his school that day and the accident happened on the way to the high school. We ALWAYS prayed with him before he got out of the car. ALWAYS.  

What are some of your favorite parts of motherhood? 

I loved it all. From as long as I can remember, I wanted to be a mom. I was involved in their lives and they in mine. I loved cooking and baking with them from an early age. Also, I taught them music, and we played and sang together often. Homeschooling was wonderful. I was nervous about it at first. But my sister was doing it, and so I tried kindergarten (which wasn’t required) and we enjoyed it. That was the year my daughter was born and it gave Brett and me bonding time. If Mikaela was fussy, she was in a snuggly around me which left my hands free to teach. I think she learned a lot that way, school came easier for her. We considered every year what we would like to do the next year. Every year the kids chose to homeschool. 

How does grace play a role in your daily life? Do you have any tips or advice for how moms can show more grace to their families? 

3 John 1:4 image

Oh, goodness! Grace. Grace is the central theme. There are always mistakes made. On my side and theirs. Apologies and forgiveness are vital in a good family relationship. 

When discipline is necessary, it’s a good time to talk about the forgiveness of God. Be sure to tell your child how much you love them and that discipline is for teaching. Never discipline when you are angry. Always pray with your child after discipline. 

 What are you most proud of as a mom? 

 ”I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.” – 3 John 1:4 (NIV)

All four of my children are serving the Lord in some capacity. Daniel is on the church board and serves in so many basic ways. He does a lot of those things that no one notices – lawn care, general checking on the building, usher. Brian served as a pastor in a small church for about 10 years until his health failed. Brett is the tech guy. He runs the sound and live stream at church. Mikaela and her husband serve as youth ministers and are both on the worship team. 

Do you have any resources that help you be a mom with grace?

You have to have a strong marriage to have a strong family. 

These are some of the parenting books I highly recommend:

Do you have anything else to add that we haven’t talked about? 

Prayer is a big key. Pray for guidance and wisdom. Pray for your children and their future spouses. Be specific as much as you can. Pray more than “Be with my child today.” Ask for wisdom and knowledge and protection. If they are attending public school, pray even harder. 

Make sure your children know that their parents love each other. Yeah, they might get disgusted, but let them see you hugging and kissing occasionally. This makes your child feel safe.  

Tell them you love them every day! Hug them even when your teenager doesn’t want you too. 

Have rules and abide by them. Children need boundaries. Back each other up. 

Connect with other Christian moms for support and encouragement in the private Facebook group, Moms with Grace!

Bible study plan about love for moms

Love in Action: A free Bible study for busy moms

As moms, life often feels like a whirlwind of tasks, emotions, and responsibilities. In the chaos, it’s easy to lose sight of what really matters: love.

Free Bible study about love for moms Pinterest image 1

Whether it’s showing love to your children, your spouse or even yourself, love is the foundation of everything we do as followers of Christ. This February, take a step back and focus on love with our 28-day Bible reading plan designed specifically for busy moms.

Join the online study

While you can do the study on your own or in your women’s small group, we’d also love for you to join us online. Starting Feb. 1, 2025, we’ll be discussing the study in our private Facebook group, Christian Moms with Grace.

Throughout the year, we complete Bible studies like this one and have a free monthly Bible reading plan as well.

Why focus on love?

Love isn’t just a feel-good emotion; it’s a command from God and the essence of our faith. In Matthew 22:37-39, Jesus tells us to love God with all our heart, soul, and mind and to love our neighbor as ourselves. But how do we live that out in our daily lives as moms? This Bible reading plan will guide you through Scripture to help you explore God’s love, love in marriage, a mother’s love, and how to show love to others.

How the plan works

This 28-day Bible reading plan is broken into four weeks spanning the month of February 2025. Each has its own theme:

  1. Stories of God’s Love in the Bible (Feb. 1-9): Discover the depth of God’s love through powerful stories like the Prodigal Son and Ruth.
  2. Marriage Love (Feb. 10-16): Dive into Scripture that celebrates and teaches about the beauty of unconditional love in marriage.
  3. Mother’s Love (Feb. 17-23): Reflect on God’s design for a mother’s love and how it mirrors His care for us.
  4. Love for Others (Feb. 24-28): Learn how to extend love beyond your family and into the world around you, even when it’s challenging.

Each day includes up to three Bible verses—perfect for fitting into even the busiest mom’s schedule. You’ll also find weekly reflection questions to help you process what you’ve read and apply it to your life.

Why this plan is perfect for moms

As moms, we need encouragement that meets us where we are. This plan is:

  • Doable: With just a few verses a day, you can stay consistent without feeling overwhelmed.
  • Relevant: The themes address the unique ways love impacts our roles as moms, wives and Christ-followers.
  • Inspiring: Each passage is a reminder of God’s love for you and His call to share that love with others.

This February, don’t let the busyness of life keep you from diving deeper into God’s Word. Take the time to reflect on love and let it transform your heart, your relationships and your faith. Join us on this journey of love—one day, one verse, one moment at a time.

Let’s make February a month where love isn’t just something we feel but something we live out daily. Are you ready to join us?

Week 1 of "Love in Action," a free Bible study for mom: God's Love

Week 1: God’s Love

As mamas, our days are filled with moments that challenge and bless us, often in equal measure. In the midst of all this, there’s one constant: God’s love.

His love is the foundational cornerstone of our faith and a source of strength in our everyday lives. The stories of God’s love in the Bible remind us that His love is eternal, unchanging and available to us in every situation.

From the Prodigal Son to Ruth’s loyalty, see how God’s love transforms lives.

Love in Action, week 2: Love in Marriage

Week 2: Marriage Love

Marriage is one of God’s most beautiful gifts to us, a sacred covenant designed to reflect God’s unconditional love for His people. Yet, as any couple knows, it’s not always easy to live out that kind of unconditional love in marriage.

Thankfully, the Bible provides us with wisdom, encouragement and practical guidance to nurture our marriages with selfless love and mutual respect.

This week, we’ll explore how to embody unconditional love in marriage and build a relationship that both honors God’s command and reflects His steadfast love.

Week 3: Mother’s Love

Celebrate the unique role of a mother’s love and its connection to God’s character.

Full content coming Feb. 14, 2025.

Week 4: Love for Others

Learn to love your neighbor and even your enemies with sincerity and compassion.

Full content coming Feb. 21, 2025.

Free online Bible studies for moms

Complete Bible studies for personal devotionals or women’s groups

Mom life is busy. Whether you’re up to your elbows in diapers or scratching your head at your teen’s latest antics, you barely have time to complete a thought.

Finding time for Bible study in the midst of chaos can be challenging — to say the least. I get it. I am the same way.

Free Bible studies for moms Pinterest image 11

Through the years, I’ve learned to set realistic expectations for myself. I’m not a mama who can get up at 5 a.m. daily and spend an hour going through Bible study.

I’m too tired to make that happen, because life doesn’t stop as I juggle my roles as mom, wife, writer, freelancer, content creator, homemaker and more.

During the first few years of motherhood, I was really challenged by this and struggled to connect with God and do anything more than survive. Some phases of life really are just about survival!

Yet, I am a happier mom, wife and person when I am connected to God. Making that a priority is important.

So, I have gotten creative with my spiritual time. My best prayer time is in the shower. I have a chance to read my Bible in peace when my kiddos are off for the day, and I’m eating breakfast.

Whatever your spiritual time looks like, it’s OK. God meets us in the mess, fray and chaos of motherhood!

With all of that in mind, I decided it was time to make some resources for other mamas like me who are doing their best to keep all the balls in the air and stay connected to their Heavenly Father.

Connect with other Christian moms

Especially if you’re going through the study alone, be sure to connect with other Christian moms like you in our private Facebook group, Christian Moms with Grace. Throughout the year we go through Bible studies together.

And every month, we have a short, topical and free Bible reading plan we discuss as well along with other faith and practical topics.

Free online Bible studies

These studies are all free and are great for personal devotion time and Bible study or women’s small groups. They include videos, reading plans, worksheets and more.

Everything is in bite-sized pieces to fit more easily into your schedule. Scroll down, and explore all of the topics.

Love in Action

As moms, life often feels like a whirlwind of tasks, emotions, and responsibilities. In the chaos, it’s easy to lose sight of what really matters: love.

Whether it’s showing love to your children, your spouse or even yourself, love is the foundation of everything we do as followers of Christ. This February, take a step back and focus on love with our 28-day Bible reading plan designed specifically for busy moms.

Love in Action free Bible study

Grace-Filled Stress Relief

When I asked a group of mamas what topic they’d most like to study, the resounding answer was stress management. We mamas are stressed!

And I relate. In this season of life, I’m trying to figure out balancing all the things from homework to practices to work to laundry to grocery shopping and on the long to-do list goes!

Unsurprisingly, I was very on board to do a study on stress management; I’ll be the first to raise my hand and admit I’m a struggling mom. 

This free 30-Day study, “Grace-Filled Stress Relief,” is ideal for busy moms. In just a couple of minutes a day, you can draw closer to God and find His peace and rest in the midst of your hectic mama life.

Find all the details about the stress-relief Bible study for moms here

Other free Bible study resources

While these aren’t full-fledged Bible studies, I’ve got some other great Bible study resources for you as well.

Fruit of the Spirit worksheets

With 12 free resources, take a deeper dive into the Fruits of the Spirit and how they can help you become a better mom and wife.

Fruits of the Spirit worksheets for adults

Free Bible reading plans for moms

Grow in your spiritual walk with these simple reading plans

As moms, we know how busy life gets. Between keeping up with the kids, managing the house and juggling everything else on your plate, finding time to sit and read your Bible can feel overwhelming.

Free Bible reading plans for moms Pinterest image 7

But here’s the good news: spending time in God’s Word doesn’t have to be complicated or take hours. These Bible reading plans are designed with busy moms in mind—you can find encouragement, hope and peace in just a few minutes each day.

Each plan focuses on 1-2 verses per day, giving you enough to reflect on without feeling rushed or overwhelmed. Every week includes three reflection questions to help you dig a little deeper and connect what you’re reading to your everyday life.

Plus, you’ll find a prayer and praises page with each plan so you can keep track of the things you’re praying for and celebrating along the way.

I’ve also added bonus resources for each reading plan—completely free—to help you take your study even further. All the additional content, including videos, Bible study worksheets and Scripture cards, make it easy for you to grow closer to God in the midst of motherhood.

I pray these reading plans will bless and encourage you as you lean into His love and guidance every day.

Bible reading plan for encouragement

Life can get busy, hectic and downright difficult. This 30-day reading plan is full of Bible verses to encourage and uplift you. You also get a page of reflection questions and a prayer journal page.

Go deeper with the top 5 encouraging Bible verses for moms.

Bible reading plan for stress management

Life can get busy, hectic and downright difficult. This 30-day reading plan is full of Bible verses to help you find some relief from stress with different themes for each week. You also get a page of reflection questions and a prayer journal page. You’ll also get a page with links and QR codes for additional free resources you can use.

Don’t miss the complete “Grace-Filled Stress Relief” Bible study with weekly devotionals, videos and more.

Bible reading plan about gratitude

This 30-day Bible reading plan about gratitude is great for busy moms on the go. It includes one or two verses each day and three reflection questions for each week.

Take a deeper dive into Biblical gratitude and grow in your relationship with God.

Read more about developing an attitude of gratitude mindset.

Advent Bible reading plan

This 31-day Advent Bible reading plan is great for busy mamas. It highlights a verse or two per day and includes three reflection questions for each week, a prayer journal page and a page with additional free resources.

Take a closer look at Advent and get ideas for family activities in this article.

Bible reading plan about hope

This 31-day Bible reading plan about hope is great for busy mamas. It highlights a verse or two per day and includes three reflection questions for each week, a prayer journal page and a page with additional free resources.

A Free Advent Bible reading plan for moms this Christmas

A simple way to celebrate the birth of Christ this season

The holiday season is filled with hustle and bustle that can leave even the most organized mom feeling overwhelmed. With buying gifts, attending events, keeping up with family traditions and managing our households, we can lose sight of the true meaning of Christmas—the celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ.

This year, I invite you to pause and reflect with an Advent Bible reading plan designed specifically for moms. This Advent reading plan is a great way to stay grounded in God’s Word throughout the month of December, focusing on the story of Jesus and His miraculous arrival.

Advent Bible Reading Plan Pinterest Image 1

The plan includes daily Bible readings, reflective questions and a dedicated page for prayer requests and praises. Whether you’re doing this as part of your personal quiet time, with a small group or even as part of your family devotions, it’s a beautiful way to slow down and keep your eyes on Jesus.

What is an Advent Bible reading plan?

The season of Advent marks the weeks leading up to Christmas. It’s a time for Christians to prepare their hearts for the coming of Christ.

An Advent Bible reading plan is a structured guide to help us get into God’s word every day and focus on the story of Christ from prophecy to fulfillment.

This Advent Scripture reading plan weaves together key Old Testament prophecies, the beautiful narrative from the Gospel of Luke and New Testament reflections on the significance of Christ’s birth.

For moms, it can be particularly meaningful. In the midst of the busyness of the Christmas season, these daily readings offer a chance to connect with the Holy Spirit, reflect on God’s promises and discover fresh ways to celebrate the true reason for this season.

How the Advent reading plan works

This Advent plan is designed to be simple and flexible. Starting on December 1st, you’ll read one or two verses each day, following themes that walk through the Christmas story:

Week 1: The Promise of a Savior
Week 2: Mary’s Yes
Week 3: The Gift of Good News
Week 4: Worship and Giving
Week 5: Living the Christmas Story

Each day’s reading is short enough to fit into your busy schedule while still providing time to meditate on its meaning. Plus, you’ll find reflective questions for each week’s reading, encouraging you to go deeper and apply these truths to your life.

Why use an Advent Bible reading plan?

For many moms, the busyness of the season can overshadow the joy of preparing for Christ’s birth. This Advent Scripture reading plan is a tool to help you reclaim the peace and wonder of the Advent season. Here’s how it can bless you:

Reconnect with God’s Word

In the flurry of holiday preparations, it’s easy to let time in Scripture slip. This plan helps you stay consistent with daily scripture readings, guiding you through the birth of Christ while highlighting the beauty of God’s faithfulness.

Reflect on the true meaning of Christmas

Through Advent reflections and days of readings, you’ll be reminded of the richness of the Christmas story and God’s great love for us. This isn’t just about knowing the story of Jesus—it’s about experiencing the wonder of His arrival anew.

Strengthen family traditions

This plan isn’t just for moms! It’s a wonderful resource for family devotions, allowing you to share the story of Christ with your kids.

Consider pairing the readings with a children’s Bible or using the Advent calendar as a visual aid for younger kids.

Create space for prayer and gratitude

Alongside the Advent readings, you’ll find a printable page for recording prayer requests and praises. This is an opportunity to reflect on how God has worked in your life and to bring your cares before Him in this special season.

Get the free Advent Bible reading plan

This Advent Bible reading plan is a simple yet powerful way to stay connected to God’s Word during the Advent season. Whether you’re a mom juggling schedules or looking for a way to introduce your kids to the story of Christ, this plan offers a thoughtful approach to the busyness of the Christmas season.

Ideas for Using the Advent Reading Plan as a Family

  1. Incorporate it into your nightly routine: Gather as a family each evening to read the day’s Scripture. Pair it with lighting a candle on your Advent wreath or sharing something you’re grateful for that day.
  2. Use it with a children’s Bible: For younger kids, read the verses from a children’s Bible with illustrations. This helps bring the story of Christ to life in a way that’s easy for them to understand.
  3. Tie it to your Advent calendar: If you use an Advent calendar, pair each day’s treat or activity with the corresponding daily scripture reading to reinforce the true meaning of Christmas.
  4. Create a prayer chain: Write prayer requests or praises on paper strips each day after reading the Scripture. Link them together to form a chain that grows throughout the month. On Christmas morning, review your chain and thank God for His faithfulness.
  5. Make it interactive: After each day’s reading, invite your kids to draw or color something inspired by the verse. For example, they could draw angels after reading about the shepherds or a star for the Wise Men.
  6. Start a family journal: Use a notebook to jot down a quick reflection each day as a family. Answer questions like, “What did we learn about Jesus today?” or “How can we live out today’s verse?”
  7. Tie it to family traditions: Incorporate the readings into established traditions. For instance, share the Scriptures while decorating the tree, setting up a nativity scene, or baking Christmas cookies.
  8. Share the plan with others: Invite extended family or friends to join you in the Advent Bible readings. You could even set up a group chat to share reflections, prayer requests or praises throughout the month.
  9. Bring it into Sunday dinner: If your family gathers weekly for dinner, take a few minutes to review the week’s verses and discuss what stood out to each person.
  10. Celebrate milestones: As you move through the season of Advent, celebrate milestones like Mary’s “yes” or the shepherds hearing the good news. Use these moments to discuss how they connect to the way we live out our faith today.

A Great Way to Celebrate the Birth of Jesus

This Advent reading plan is more than just daily scripture readings; it’s an opportunity to slow down, connect with your family and focus on the true reason for the season.

Whether you’re reading on your own, leading your kids through the verses, or sharing them with friends, it’s a beautiful way to prepare your heart for Christmas.

Download your free Advent Bible reading plan today, and let this holiday season be a time to celebrate the birth of Christ with purpose, joy and peace!

Free Advent Bible reading plan download image

Don’t miss this post with free Advent printables for children:

8 Simple Christmas traditions to bring your family closer (plus 2 FREE printables)

And don’t miss these 5-minute Christmas family devotion books as well!

Best 5-Minute Advent Devotionals for Families image

From potty training to college: Trusting God’s strength for moms

Trusting in God’s unfailing presence through the ups and downs of motherhood

“God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.”

Psalm 46:1 (NIV)

Knowing that God is there for us and will strengthen us whenever we face trouble is incredibly comforting and encouraging. Even better is that He is there to help us no matter the trouble from struggles with potty training to sending your kiddo off to college.

I love picturing an image of God holding me in his arms when I’m weary and overwhelmed. I imagine being surrounded by God’s love and filled with his strength. 

This verse reminds me of that. Even when I am struggling and don’t feel like I’m doing a good job as a mama, God is right there with me.

In the busyness and overwhelm of life, I try to find ways to seek God as my refuge through things like devotional time, prayer time and listening to Christian music.

Today, we can let God hold us when we are too weary to keep going!

Prayer

Dear God, thank you for being our refuge and strength always. Lord, lift me up today and strengthen me. Help me through all of the troubles I face. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Psalm 46:1 image
A prayer for God's strength

Prayers without words: How the Spirit intercedes for moms

God meets you in silence with His perfect understanding

“In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans.”

Romans 8:26 (NIV)

Figuring out what and how to pray is sometimes challenging. Even as someone who has been in church her whole life and feels a close connection to God, I still struggle with having the right words.

Because the truth is, life is difficult. There are situations I face that I don’t even know what to ask God to do. I’m rendered basically speechless.

That’s where the Holy Spirit steps in. How perfect is God in knowing our needs and meeting them before we even realize the issue is there?!

For those times when you don’t even know what to pray, rest assured the Holy Spirit is bringing requests to God on your behalf. God doesn’t forget you when you are at a loss for words. In fact, I think that’s often when he steps in the best.

Prayer

Dear God, thank you for taking care of my needs even before I know I have them. I ask for your guidance and wisdom in all I have going on in my life. Thank you for the gift of your Holy Spirit. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Romans 8:26 image
A prayer of thanks for the Holy Spirit