Finding God when life is scary
A few months back, I shared this on Facebook. I decided to share it on the blog as well thanks to the overwhelming response I got from it.
Last night, my 8-year-old daughter came into my room at 2 a.m. I knew something was afoot, because she is my good sleeper. She had had a bad dream and needed some comfort. Of course, I obliged. We chatted and snuggled a bit. I prayed for her silently and eventually sent her back to bed.
Within 10 minutes, she was back and needed me to be in her room with her. Previously I’ve sat on her bed and put my hand on her back to soothe her, but now she has a loft bed and that’s not possible. So instead, I pulled her desk chair to the middle of the room and took a seat. I prayed for her again and told her about it this time. We talked very briefly about how to stop thinking about her dream. Within 15 minutes, she was settled in enough to fall back asleep. My presence in her room made her relax and let her worry go.
As I sat there quietly, trying to stay awake, I thought about what a demonstration it was. What she didn’t know was that in between her visits to my room, my prayers continued for her and for her 5-year-old brother. Earlier that day, her brother got into water over his head and was unable to keep his head above water. Thanks to some quick action from my dad and husband, he was saved, but I’ve read about secondary drowning. And I was anxious. He had absolutely no sign of it. And he was totally fine for hours. This had happened before lunchtime even. But still, I worried. It’s what we moms do. However, as I prayed I gave my worry to God. I felt peace that He was in charge, so I could rest.
That’s exactly what my daughter needed. She needed to know someone was in charge, someone was right there for her so that she could rest. Oh how many times I need that! And my Heavenly Father is always there if I only think to talk to Him. Because sometimes I just worry on my own. Sometimes I don’t think to talk to Him about it. Sometimes I battle my anxiety on my own. It never goes well.
I headed back to bed (after double-checking that both kids were sound asleep — and my son was breathing) and fell fast asleep after once again giving my worry to God. The thing is with the way my daughter’s bed is raised and where I was able to sit, there was no way she could see me, but she knew I was there and just my presence was enough. I can’t see God, but I can feel Him. And His presence is always enough if I just open myself up to Him.
Whatever you have going on right now, know that God is there. He will sit up all night in your bedroom in a small desk chair because He loves you so completely and fully. He will take your worries and fears and give you His peace. He may not fix everything the way you want, but He will be there through it all and is willing to hold you close if only you cling to Him. I can think of no greater love and no greater reassurance.